just because...

here goes nothing.

2010-09-30T21:34:00.015+08:00

i will TRY my very best to recall what happened since 29th august.
let me see.

31st august was iftar at simpang.

the people present at that point of time. but by the time it was nearing the break of fast time, more were there. namely; myself, fadzli, yan, yaya, lynna, zahrin, azri & wife, adi & wife, giant & gf, kai plus 2 other couples i do not know. =\

anyway, spize's service during the iftar was horrendously horrible. majority of us actually reacher quite early, about 1.5hours early or so. so what happened was, we decided to order our food first. which we thought was a good idea because then we thought we would be able to get out food early or on time for the break of fast. so some of our food did come. keyword: SOME. majority of the food didnt arrive even after majority of us has finished our food. & the thing was, we even brought it up to the manager (or so he claimed to be) about the "missing" orders. we were told that he would look into it but still, nothing was done. take note that by this time, it was already like 30 to 40mins after the break of fast. by this time, yan was super pissed off because it was basically an "empty promise" made by the manager. & was irked us even more was that some other tables that ordered later than us has already gotten their food.

i mean, we would definitely understand that we were in a big group but if your people think you cant remember our orders, you should have taken the initiative to write down our orders. plus its not as if we ordered ALOT of things, we order a meal for each of us. so its different orders, but you should not have expected that we ordered all the same dish to accommodate to your side just so you wont forget our orders, right?

this was my food. some grilled salmon which was definitely something i wont order anymore should i ever go over to spize for food. it was VERY bland, the only things i liked on this plate was the potato, broccoli & carrots. yes, only the vege. & the only reason i liked the vege was also because of nothing special. i liked them because i liked them in general. like eff la.

i only remembered i was trying to take a photo of the food because i thought it would be worth blogging about but obviously, its not. bah.

so, reminder to self: no spize for iftar. & never a 2nd time for the grilled salmon.

unfortunately for spize, not only from this incident, but from word of mouth, it was said that their service & food standard has dropped since 89.7 moved. no competition equates to an excuse to drop the standards? i dont think so. fine, they have the regulars who go to spize to hang out, or should i say a meeting point. but as a business, i dont think they should just be satisfied with just their regulars. they should always constantly provide the best service. because after all, restaurants/shops with same food concept, ie. western & asian cuisine, are constantly growing around the country. if they dont improve their standards or at least maintain the same standards they had before, then they just need to rely on their regular customers who MIGHT one day just "run" to other places too.

so after iftar, we decided to go over to kallang side for them to have some discussion on their holiday trip & sepang trip.

where's anith?
orang tengah sibuk discussing the plans, aku sibuk2 main chak-chak.

the ladies present.

the guys present.
NEXT.

i was actually on a 3week training for my job.
so it was basically back to school for me. =)

the cover of the super thick file. haha!

colours!
the 3wks jam-packed schedule, which consisted of tests every single day & THE exam on the last day! really felt like it was back to school for me. haha!
so new friends were made during the training; some close & some not. alot of fun during the classes & the neverending using of the local message system to send messages to each other. haha!
the constant worry about not passing the test everyday because that would mean having to come 30mins earlier the day after to sit for a retest.
the stress & nervousness during the validation day where everybody was constantly sure that we would fail. haha!

the place where we had to travel to 5days a week. =)

the last group photo on validation day.
so i went back to the branch on the 28th. miss the people in the branch too! =D

fadzli & myself have got a new hobby.
something which i was constantly bugging him to go for but he was constantly telling me that its a waste of time bla bla bla.
but now he'd hooked.

whats new? he'll never take into consideration my suggestions anyway by simply brushing all of it off as "waste of time" or "waste of money" or whatever else.
now he's the one who cant stop going for it, even to the extend of getting himself a personal rod.

the bait. chicken heart to be cut into small pieces & mixed with some dunno-what powder. haha!

at pasir ris.

at jurong.
we brought shahrul along for our prawning session in jurong. & this fella dont even wanna try la. so he was just sitting down watching fadzli & myself prawning while reading his motor culture and munching on his cheezels. then when fadzli was trying to unhook the prawn he caught, he broke the poor prawn's claws(?) so shahrul was like making noise & saying that fadzli's cruel. haha!

then this silly fella went to do something stupid, which was allowing one of the prawns which i caught to "pinch" his finger with the claws. haha!

so then after that, decided to go over to pasir ris to cook the prawns!

the fried prawns with the big prawn that day i caught as the main focus. haha!

the excited kids with the fried prawns.
ouh ya!
raya!

how could i forget about it?!

anyway, it was raya on the 3rd sept. so here are some pictures. haha!

my heavily pregnant sis-in-law (haha!), myself, amni & syukriah.

my hero, tajul asyrani.

my princess, iklil syukriah.

my darling, tajul zahirul-haq.
so yeah.

didnt really raya this year because i was busy with training & whatnots.

basket! have you seen the new pizza hut's cheesy 7 pizza. like, omg la!
i want nao!
i think it cant give me a cheese-gasm! omgomgomg!!!

& kns. stupid spams on my tagboard.
maybe i should just remove the damn tagboard. pffft.

btw,
if you see this,

do remember that you're being served by anith a. rahwom. so please do rate my customer service for you. =)

so how?

2010-09-30T21:31:00.002+08:00

i've been staring at the screen for the past 45minutes & i really have no idea on how & where to start.
too many things i know has happened since my last update, which was a month ago, some i remember & some i forgot.

so how? =\

by the roadside.

2010-08-29T18:29:00.003+08:00

alot of things has been happening since my last update. haha!
in no particular order:

met fadzli the other day after he accompanied yan to some bike shop. as per normal, he'll pick me up from work and with no where in mind to go, we hung out at yan's place. prior to that, bought some food from geylang bazaar. so we hang around, i ended up sleeping. haha! and aftr maghrib, we rode all the way to town to meet yaya & then to uncle mus. met zahrin & lynna there and we spent an hour or two there before proceeding to adam's corner for some supper/sahur, joined by bani & wawa.

haha!
that's alot of name within a paragraph. lol!

fadzli & myself went to watch step up 3d. initial plan was to go to kallang leisure park for the movie but while we were on ecp, the sky was getting so dark that we detoured and ended up at suntec. parked the bike at the basement and proceed to the ticketing counter to grab the tickets. bought some food too. i didnt fast due to some circumstance and fadzli, well, he didnt fast. *shrugs*

my verdict on the show?
well, in my personal point of view, the storyline was a little too predictable. & somehow or rather, parts of the story were "borrowed" from the movies step up, step up 2 and how she move. so yeah.
however, the dance moves in the movie was superb. i dont understand though why the lead actor was the lead actor. he didnt do any dancing for the pirates. bahh.

love this guy man!
his ability to control his muscles, one word, WICKED!

another of my favourite scene.

another favourite scene of mine in the movie was when the kids were dancing during the finale. ubber cuteness to the max, can!

so anyway, after the movie,
we were both stuck in suntec due to the rain. had late dinner at kfc while waiting for the rain to stop. did some window shopping & some shopping before proceeding to geylang, again, to meet the rest after the rain has stopped.
so park the bike over at yan's workplace & went to join zahrin & lynna over at the bazaar while waiting for yan to finish his work.

so around 11-ish, went back to yan's place & met azri, bani & wawa. had a few egg tarts and hot devil drumlets. yummy!
& since my eyes couldnt take it any longer, i had to go home. haha!

was on mc on thursday & friday. bronchitis is back in the house yo!
so fadzli has to stay away from me whenever he smokes. haha!
sorry, my dearest.
either you stay away from me when you smoke or i'd get asthma. your choice, baby. =P

accompanied fadzli to do up his bike on friday. wrong choice man!
even though i brought a book to read while waiting, i nearly died due to boredom. haha!
in the end, i fall asleep with my helmet as my pillow. lol!
perangai tak senonoh!

ended up at tampines after that because that's the nearest we could go to, taken into consideration that the sky was pretty much grey by the time the bike was done.
i needed to survey shoes for my work & fadzli needed to survey backpacks.
so we went from tampines mall to century square then to tampines mall again & to tampines1. after that to tampines mall & in the end, i bought my shoes at century square. haha! not taken into consideration the number of times we went to the individual shops. lol!
poor fadzli.

settled down at the food court at century square to break our fast by 6pm. lucky we were there at 6pm because by 630pm, the place was full.

didnt have anywhere in mind to go. the plan was actually to meet his colleagues over at geylang but it was a friday & since i worked morning on saturdays, he sent me home first before proceeding to geylang to meet his colleagues.

after work on saturday saw me going over to pasir ris.
took the bus to pasir ris from my work place. had a great sleep on the bus. haha!
1.5hrs of journey. lol.

break fast with his family and then went over to esso at paya lebar. waited for shahrul, who was 30mins late! pfffft.

then we wanted to make our way to still road. & my boyfriend decided to go by the long way because he wanted to "escape" the traffic over at geylang. haha!
ended up we actually made one big round. lol!

the place.

while waiting for komeng.

the nice chap who chose delicious durians for us. =)

wash hands. thank you.

smokers.
tsk! tsk! tsk!
so, we had a total of 6durians between the 4 of us, 3 bottles of mineral water & 1 coconut. total was $46, which in my personal point of view is acceptable. when taken into consideration how yummy the durians were, you know, the bittersweet taste. yeap!

went home straight after that & i was feeling quite heaty. haha!

& today when i woke up, i was practically voiceless!
& my cough's getting worse.

haha!
padan muka!

anyway,
i just wanna share some fantastic videos i came across while surfing youtube.

damn! i wish i am at least half as talented as they are. lol!

anyway,
what's an entry without a picture of fadzli & me?

=)

random-ish.

2010-08-17T22:39:00.009+08:00

i never got the chance to wish my dear readers selamat menjalani ibadah puasa.

ramadhan has always had a special place in my heart.
not only because it's the sacred month but also it is the month when fadzli & myself first met. its also the month we got together.
& everytime i reminisce about ramadhan in 2006 it never failed to put a smile on my face. 4 ramadhans has passed.
who would have guess that we managed to see 4 ramadhans passed us by just like that.

ramadhan is also the month that i'll always go to geyland more often than not,
almost at least one a week.
& i still wont get sick of the place.

the food, the deco, the atmosphere.
everything.

so just yesterday,
fadzli & myself decided to give geylang a visit after i was done with work. =)

before proceeding to our location for break of fast we dropped by a stall which fadzli simply loves to spend his money on.

approximately 30 minutes & $xx spent later...

comel kan? ♥so break fast was at smp.
& we actually sat down around 1hour or so prior to the time for break of fast. haha!
epitome of kiasuism. lol!

so it was more of walking around the bazaar.

because it was stil early in the month of ramadhan there wasnt much crowd.
so even if i were to snap photos, it wont really show the awesome-ness of the atmosphere of the bazaar.

so we were walking around the malay village side when we decided to randomly go for a ear candling/feet sauna promotion. since i was wearing a tudung and the treatment was done in the the open,
fadzli did the ear candling & i did the feet sauna.

according to fadzli the ear candling was great. the girl who did it for him knew he was a heavy smoker just but looking at his ear wax which was "sucked" by the procedure.
for myself, the feet sauna was superb. especially after almost a whole day of standing & then continued with walking. =)

walked around some more,
snapping random shots.

not much of random shots actually because i was with a bad headache by the time were done with the breaking of fast. =(

anyway
last sunday saw me breaking fast with his family over at pasir ris.
which was actually a last minute decision.
packed some ondeh-ondeh which i did for his family.

dont know how it tasted like actually.
fasting what! how to test taste?
tsk!

anyway,
without realising, its been a month since i first started out in my new job.
time seemed to pass by so fast, dont you think so?

the "last" dinner.

2010-08-09T00:19:00.010+08:00

saturday was kind of a whirlwind for me.
what's with the upset tummy, constant vomitting and whatnots.

we were randomly messaging each other on friday night while he was at work when i told him about this advert i saw on tv for sakura's seafood buffet. & this boy asked me to give the price a check.

i wss kind of reluctant because well, i just started my new job and i've yet to receive my first salary. and by us going, it would just mean that he'd have to pay for me. its already pretty bad considering how he's in a way taking care of my monetary expenses for my food, transport & such. to the extend of even buying me my toiletries. =(

& its not fair, really, for him to spend that amount of money on food just because me & my big mouth decided to share with him about the advert. because if we go, he would be paying for the both of us.
not that he cant afford it but well, he has his own shit to take care of, right?

& its a double feeling of guilt for me because he wants to bring me there. simply because he knows about my penchant love for seafood. =\

ouh wells, i tried saying 'no' twice but i know if i do it any more than that, we're going to go through an argument. well, yeah.

so saturday came & it started out with me going over to pasir ris to accompany him wash both his bikes.

the kids whom i miss so damn much after not seeing them for 1273219864812 weeks since i started working. =(
penat sangat2 tu.

wah! so shiny!
anyways,
went back home & waited for fadzli to finish cleaning up. we were wondering where to go to pass the time because the dinner only start at 6pm and it was only 2-ish.
& if we were to get out of pasir ris to pass the time, its pretty merepek because then we'll have to go back to pasir ris for sakura then out of pasir ris again because he'll have to send me hom then back to pasir ris for him again. haha!
we definitely do not want to go to the ones in town. its a weekend. town on a weekend & us, doesnt really click that well, you see. unless of course we've something in mind.

so i suggested going over to the ones in the west.
& asking his friends along too.
i think they asked a few more other people but unfortunately, the rest couldnt make it.

so we went over to jurong to pick shahrul up.
then off to mr. teh tarek for some hot drinks & waited for wady.
i am supposed to be on a non-dairy diet but i totaly forgot and drank teh-cino. bad choice because i could feel my tummy rumbling. bahh.
lucky that was it.

at around 540pm, we made our move.

to omni theatre!

the 3 stooges.
who never fail to make me laugh with their merepek-ness to the extend of me getting tummy aches.
some of the buffet spread.

we stayed on for awhile,
eating, talking, laughing like nobody's business.
with the boys re-enacting various scripts from p. ramlee movies. omg. you wouldnt believe it la how much they memorised. haha!
& we decided to end the night kinda early because fadzli needed to go home early as he was going to track the day after.

felt so bloated & full. wish i could eat more.
there's so many more dishes that i didnt get to eat. haha!

than you, love!
next time, insya'allah, will be my treat, yeah?

chirp chirp.

2010-08-01T15:21:00.002+08:00

happy 1st august everyone!

anyway, i made a minor mistake the other day at work. thank god i was able to rectify that mistake.
alhamdullilah.

& i got stuck in a jam on the way to work the other day due to a mini flood. first time i was late for work. luckily my manager was understanding enough since i have been reaching & starting my work much earlier that the stipulated time i was supopsed to start.
give & take situation over there.

fadzli collected his new shades the other day at bishan. yes, i was with him.
picked me up from work, in the rain & all.
i dont know what's up with him having so many shades when he'll use only one. haha!
suka hati dia la kan.
haha!

saturday was halfday for me.
it was also a day when i "explored" part of my workplace because i was looking for a bus service that goes to lavender. ended up there was a bus from the normal busstop i'll take the bus home. haha!

& since there was a food fest over at the malay heritage centre, we decided to give it a go. such a waste because i didnt bring my camera along with me because there wasnt any confirmation of us going there. unfortunately, there was nothing fantastic, only a few shops here & there.
ended up buying a drink for the both of us and that twist potato thing. yeah, thats it.
stayed a while to watch the show then out we go.

ended up going to bussorah street to look for my kueh bakar.

for 2mths plus i've been craving for this. & it turned out to be such a disappointment. i am sad.

but ouh wells, thank you fadzli for even buying it for me.

so we decided to have our meal. initial plan was to have our meal at kampong glam cafe. but fadzli knowing what a foodie i am, suggested to give this new place a try.

its a small restaurant along bussorah street owned by this brothers who is quite well known in the local malay music industry - nuradee.

it was quite empty when we arrived. there were only 4people at the outdoor seats and another 2 couples indoors, excluding us.
but by the time we left, the place was almost full. haha!
i think we bring luck to these places because this always happen. haha!

there was a variety of dishes from the menu, ranging from chicken, pasta, sandwiches, side dishes, finger food, desserts and also drinks.
so since it was our first time there, we decided to give their Duo Combo a try.

at $19.30, it comprises of 3piece of chicken (which we were able to opt for the parts without any extra charges), a 6" submarine, coleslaw, fries and 2 drinks. the girl who was serving us recommended the roasted beef filling for the submarine.

3pc chicken; breastmeat, thigh & drum.
fried to order so it was served fresh & piping hot to us. you can actually taste the spiciness in the marination of the chicken. the chicken was a little small, according to fadzli.

6" submarine; roasted beef.
in my personal point of view, i think it is filling to eat by itself though it might be a little to "muak". i dont really like it though because i think the quantity of the sauce is too overwhelming that it actually "killed" the flavour of the roasted beef.

fries.
nothing special. maybe because i am never a fan of fries, except long john silver's & homemade.

coleslaw.
tasted very much like arnold's.
the downside was we had to wait a long time for our food to be served.

see, sampai fadzli pun muka boring tunggu makanan lama sangat.

even so, our 3pc chicken was initially served to the wrong table. so my drink was already 3/4 finished by the time the food was served & fadzli had to share his drink with me. also, one of the waitresses was rather "loud", you know the "attention seeking" loud, like she was arguing with one of the guys in the kitchen.

ouh wells, maybe it was just a one time thing.

anyway,
after our meal, we dropped by abboy because fadzli wanted to do something to his bike. i dont know what, so ya.

so sat awhile there talking, not knowing where to go till he decided to send his helmet to his friend who was at changi chalet.
so we stood at the carpark for a good 30mins or so with the friend before we decided to zoom to tampines to do something about our rings.

the latest couple ring we had was pretty much screwed up. fadzli's had one of the screws missing. while mine was extra loose even though i had mine exchanged 2months ago.
so we ended up getting a new design altogether because i just find it ridiculous that the workmanship of the ring was pretty sucky.

its a pity though because the ring was something different from the normal rings we had because it was squarish.
ended up taking a normal round ring with a small onyx stone.

yet to take a photo of it though so maybe when we do, i will post it up. =)

walked around tampines1 for awhile. went to uniqlo but the white top that i wanted to buy for work was no longer available. bummer.
so just did a little window shopping and trying out oakley shade. haha!
went for a little dessert at macd, tried out the new oreo shake & shares the mudpie mcflurry.

had to end the date quite early though because fadzli was in morning shift for today. & the poor boy had to wake up extra early for his morning shifts since the transfer.

ouh wells,
that's pretty much it.

here's ending the entry with a picture taken last weekend at pasir gudang.

xoxo.

the sounds in the wind.

2010-07-28T21:22:00.002+08:00

i officially started my new job last monday.
yay!
though location is tad too far from my place (& fadzli's place) but its ok.
i basically entertained myself on the 1hour bus journey listening to class95 and snapping random photos on my phone. haha!

so far, the new workplace's been good. my colleagues are a nice bunch of people too. me being me, asked a lot of questions. haha! lucky for me, my colleagues are patient enough to answer my 1001 questions. up to a point where some questions i asked, they were not able to answer and had to check out the company's intranet for the answer. lol!

i get to meet alot of people too, something which i love. and there are some regulars too. haha!
& i dont get called by my real name (ie. anith) in my workplace. i guess because they are not able to pronounce my name proper. only a few calls me by my real name. other than that, i am called girl-girl, ah girl, xiaomei, darling, sayang, dear. yeah. haha! kinda weird at first but i got use to it already la. haha!

been busy with work that i end up sleeping real early every single day. thank god for mobile fb, but its quite inconvenient for me to check my fb via mobile. sometimes, i dont even get to check my fb. haha!
fadzli & myself rarely get to meet too this past 1.5wks because he got transferred & i just started my new job. ouh wells.

anyway,
last sunday i had to wake up so early in the morning. & it sucks because i woke up before my alarm clock went off. because i actually dreamt that my alarm clock went off. bummer.

so i just prepped myself & went to the coffeeshop, bought coffee for the guys & waited.
& waited. & waited.
haha!

because shahrul & wady was supposed to pick fadzli & myself at my void deck at 630am but wady overslept so they were late.
fadzli just couldnt keep still because he was so nervous about his race that he was pacing up & down. & also chain smoking. haha!
i couldnt help but laugh at him la!

nervous wreck! lol!
so eventually, shahrul & wady reached. i wanted to sleep in the car but with these baduts around, that is quite an impossible feat. so in the end, i snapped some photos.

before proceeding on to pg, dropped by the nearby petrol kiosk to get some brekkie. initial plan with fadzli was to eat breakfast at macd but since we were with sharul & wady, we just dont think its appropriate la. plus we were already quite late. haha!
so the boys got their supplies of cigarettes, bottles of mineral water, etc. met with some other at the petrol kiosk & off we zoomed to pg.

but when we reached there, the pit wasnt open yet. the boys unpacked the things in the car & then they went to other places to catch up with their other friends. & left me alone with the stuff. -_-

i ended up going to the other side because the sun was too hot for me to bear.
bole cair, ok! =P

so the pit opened & i got myself busy with snapping of photos! =)

race was starting so the boys prepped themselves.
maybe i am bias like that, but of course i would take more pictures of my boyfriend la. haha!

this was before their practice session.

then more of his friends came & the place became more kecoh. haha!

there are of course more photos than this. too many photos actually. the rest of the photos are in my fb. but of course, viewable by friends only. =)

so fadzli got 4th position for his category. his clutch gave way after the 4th lap. kesian ni anak. duit lagi kluar.
next race is on the 3rd of october. that's what the organiser say la. haha!
coiincidentally, it falls on syukriah's birthday so i am not really sure if i am able to accompany him then. plus, the thought of riding to pg all the way on his bike is a bit of a turnoff for me especially after he changed his footrest to the racing footrest.
ouh wells, we see how it goes.

so after spending more than 12hours at pg, without having any proper food, the 4 of us decided to have breakfast cum lunch cum dinner cum supper at this place where wady calls restaurant pokok.

the restaurant is kinda ulu with the a kampung concept. 2 types of seating choice, one which is sitting cross legged and the other is table & chair. we opted for the cross legged seat because that's the only way shahrul could keep a lookout on his car. haha!

our two jugs of drinks: watermelon juice & watermelon with milk juice.

ikan siakap tiga rasa.

sweet & sour squid. ♥

kangkong belacan.

telor bungkus.

hotplate beancurd. my favourite kind of comfort food. but this one's kind of a disappointment. =(

daging goreng kunyit.

the aftermath of presenting such delish food to 4 famished people.
love the fact that they had live music too. not any kind of live music but angklung. so they had this rendition of popular songs by angklung, both english & malay.

my favourite had to be lady gaga's bad romance.
yeah, bad romance with angklung. cool or what?!

so once the boys settled the bill, it was a long drive back home. stuck in the jam, it started to rain. luckily we were in the car. haha!

slept all the way back. my eyes cannot tahan already la by then.
reached home & slept all the way, with my contacts & all.
overslept the next day. nasib tak lambat sampai kerje.
haha!

anyway,
one last photos before i sign off,

fadzli with his trophy for 4th position. dont play play arh. this trophy has rice inside. can feed people, ok. haha!

aye aye cap'n.

2010-07-16T11:51:00.015+08:00

tried the pirate english for my facebook. i gave up.
haha!

went jb last friday with fadzli & his friend. because his friend wanted to do something to his car.
in the end he didnt, i've no idea why though.
so then, we decided to go to this shopping centre.
& we shopped at daiso. fadzli went crazy over there. spending rm155 at daiso. haha! crazy fella. after shopping, he realised he was hungry so we went to this steamboat restaurant, restaurant johnny. haha! cute right the name of the restaurant. had a scrumptious feast there & i love my spinach noodle. funny right, i dont like eating spinach but i loved the noodle. lol! we felt so bloated after that, fadzli actually forgo his plans of buying auntie anne's. haha! kesian.
maybe next time, we can go there again, ok?

anyway,
fadzli celebrated his 31st birthday last sunday.
but this fella, when i asked him to take leave on his birthday, tak nak tau!
in the end, he still took leave because he wanted to go pg. in the end tak jadi.

& because he was supposedly working on his birthday, had to push forward his "celebration" to the saturday instead.
initially, it was supposed to be a mini surprise celebration for him with a few of his friends. but in the end, due to some unforseen circumstances, his friends couldnt make it.
since it was a surprise, he didnt know of the plan, of course.
& i had to be extra careful with the planning because the planning were done via facebook. & the fact that he knows the pasword to my facebook, didnt help.
so made plans with his mom to do the "mini celebration" at his place instead.

the plan was for me to arrive before he reached home from pg. which was supposedly to be between 3pm to 4pm. so the plan was for me to arrive between 130pm to 2pm.
but dont know why that day, he actually arrived home early, ie. BEFORE 130pm.

kns.
make my plan spoil only this mat.

so i was like wtf sia get a phonecall from him when i was in the train towards pasir ris. i thought something happened to him because usually, when he calls me when he's still in pg is when something happened to him.
so when he called me at 120pm, i swore my heart skipped a beat because i thought something happened to him. but it turned out he called to inform me he was already home.
basket. & my train just left simei. -_-

so no choice, took a cab down to his place instead of the bus because i didnt want to waste anymore time. so while i was in the cab, i was trying to prep the stuff. & once i reached his void deck, gave him a call & asked him to open the door for me.
i think i said because i needed to use the toilet urgently, maybe? haha! cant remember. all i could remember was trying to balance the box with one hand. haha!

so here's his surprise,

cupcakes with edible image of him cornering.
he wanted a cake with a picture of him cornering but i couldnt get it because
1. i am not working. so money is quite limited.
2. quite expensive because they have a minimum order for edible image cake.
3. most of those who can do edible image cake needs at least 2wks.

so had to make do with the cupcakes. =)

since leaving the cupcakes in the box were quite unpresentable, his mom & i tried to rearrange them.

first, on a plate.

then we realise it doesnt really look quite nice because it doesnt look "round".

so we decided to put it on a tray.

& the mom decided to decorate it with flowers too! haha!

the pizzas arrived finally so the kids decided to sing fadzli birthday songS.

& by songS i mean in english, malay & mandarin. haha!
amek kau!

haha! muka tak sabar nak makan cupcake. lol!

nak act cute aje!
so once they were done with the birthday song singing, it was time for the kids to bedal the cupcakes!

cake presentation "ceremony". haha.
according to age.

ashidiq, the nephew.

amirul, the son.

amirah, the daughter.

alisha, the niece.
so we hang around for awhile at home.
doint stupid things on fb. haha!

then an impromptu plan of eating soup tulang for supper!

so off we zoomed to upper paya lebar road for some tulang at deen.

bad decision making that night for supper.
because i was wearing a light coloured tudung. & erm, eating tulang, well, its kinda messy so i was too concentrated on being careful, i couldnt really enjoy the tulang.
nevertheless, it was a tulang overload because fadzli bought $12 worth of tulang for the 2 of us. that equates to 5pc of tulang for each of us. -_-

then,
on wednesday,
we rode all the way to jurong west to shahrul's house. by the time we reached there, i had pins & needles. eff.
so after we were done there, went over to teh tarek for some fooooooooooooooooodddddd.

had tom yum seafood bee hoon. bad choice!
after that was joined by wady.
then we went karaoke! yay!

makes me wonder, what kind of malay songs are non-halal. hmmm.

i totally love this remote so much, i've to see it at least once a month. haha!
shahrul die die dont wanna sing, so in the end, it was only wady, fadzli & myself singing. haha!

tarek maha tarek punya. haha! releks arh.

shahrul was actually able to sleep even with the volume so loud. lol!
so after 3 hours of non-stop singing & video recording, we ended the day around 930pm or so.
had to end early because fadzli was on the morning shift the day after.

& yesterday,
my nephew & niece decided to wash the fish tank.
& they had a little supervisor overlooking the whole process.

haha. supervisor kenet.
anyway, a special message to fadzli:

*hugs*

dimana ada kemahuan.

2010-07-06T18:56:00.013+08:00

since i've not been working for the past one month,
its really back to square one like how it was last year.

dates with fadzli on every other of his off days.

so we went to watch karate kid one of the days over at pasir ris.
the date started quite late due to the unpredictable weather and it had to end early because he was on morning shift the day after.

so since we reached e-hub quite early and the movie's at 820pm,
we decided to just try a stimulation ride.
you know the yellow thing u had to pay 6bucks for 2pax.

initially fadzli wanted to try this new 4d thing, which was 6bucks per person.
and i so totally dont think its really worth it for a 10-15minutes ride. so we forgo that & just tried that yellow ride thing.
maybe one day we try the 6bucks per person 4d thing, alright? =)

one word of advise:
never take that yellow ride thing on an empty stomach.
i dont know if its just me or maybe we chose the wrong scene but halfway through the rige, i was feeling nausea. & the moment it ended, i was rushing fadzli to get out of the ride & off i ran to the toilet to vomit my empty stomach out.
kns.

& since we were pretty much bored with e-hub,
for the first time ever, we actually entered the theatre the moment it was open. haha!
so we actually sat through 15-20mins worth of advertisements & by the time the movie started, half of our popcorn were also gone. haha!

my verdict of karate kid?
jayden smith's very talented & cute too. pretty much like a mini will smith.
but i dont understand why is the movie called karate kid when what he learnt wasnt karate?
& the movie's kinda slow at some parts which actually made me doze off for awhile.
& the storyline & ending's quite predictable.
but overall, i think its a nice show. just the kind of show i would watch just once. wont buy the dvd kinda show.
yeah.

in between, we had normal kind of dates.

but on sunday,
i woke up so early in the morning just so we could reach jurong spring cc at 830am.
omfgwth.
i woke up early on a sunday morning. lol.

there was this bikers' thing going on so fadzli & myself went over to help a friend of ours with his booth.
basically this friend ours were showcasing his leather products.
but i dont think i am of any position or have any knowledge about the products so if any of you are interested to find out more, do visit the websites which will be included at the end of this entry.

so let me entertain you with some pictures captured on the event day itself, mostly taken by myself, using fadzli's new digicam.

cheh! orang tu ada compact digicam sey!

there's a funny story linked to this photo about fadzli. its just that i dont know how to explain it. haha!

boo..mmmchakkkk...

the range of srs race leathers products.

phudzlee: ish! gatal betol hidung ni!
wady: heh heh. siak. aku ada tisu ni.
sharul: tk senonoh sey si cicak ni korek hidung in public. tsk!

senyum kambing. haha!
mmmmmbekkkkkk....

team srs;
driven by dream, powered by our people.

so should anyone of you are interested in getting any leathers from srs, do visit their webpage here & here.

& what would an entry be if i dont end it with a picture of fadzli & me?

the only photo we took that day.
or rather the only photo we took in months! haha!

live before i die.

2010-06-28T12:22:00.001+08:00

its been more than a week, yeah?
and life's been the same old same old. nothing interesting has been happening these days. if my life were to be made into a tv series, its gonna have the same storyline day in & day out. haha!

anyway,
fadzli & myself got into an accident just the other day. haha! i swear if there were cars behind us, i wouldnt be blogging anymore. & my fb page will be converted into a memorial page, if anybody even bother to do that to begin with.

speaking of fb, what the hell are theye ven doing? keep on going under maintainence. its bad enough they dont even bother to inform you, the fact that it is now more crappy than before made it worst. uurghhh!

anyway, yeah, the accident.
so i fell off the bike, which was in the middle lane, and slide to the 3rd lane. drama right? haha! and surprisingly, the road that we met with the accident, usually is packed with cars. fortunately for me that day, there wasnt any cars.
like what amni said, belom ajal. haha!
nothing too major, still alive & breathing.

btw,
stupid cab driver. screw you.

ouh, and fadzli's "sticker book" is completed. heh. let me give you a peek.

macam sticker book, right?
ok la. its not random stickers la. its his sponsors' stickers. heh. the shop supposed to close at 730pm but because of this mat's stickers, they actually closed their shop at 830pm. haha!

& to think that the bike looked like this,

omg. i am such a meanie. =p

so motor da siap, member tak waste any more time.
went to pg on thursday to test out his bike.
fully attired in everything new. haha!
& i was stuck at home, doing nothing but rot. & playing cafe world. heh.

anyways,
any of you actually keep up with world cup?
initially for this year, i thought i wanna stay away from it because i know if i were to start watching one match, i would wanna watch the others.
& it was due to this ONE match fadzli brought me to watch, now its like almost every other night i wanna watch. damn!

so there's this one "coffee shop" that fadzli brings me to for world cup matches. like the atmosphere because everybody's like really into the matches. =)

& i found out that the coffee shop opposite my place is the most non-condusive place to watch world cup. there's this huge banner which states "please keep your volume low after 10pm" thus explaining why the volume's so low, the tv's so small and majority of the people are not watching.
& the only time we went there was because the CC's packed. & there was this one old couple who cant seem to keep their hands off each other. omg. irritating!

ouh, and it was the first time i ever concentrated during motogp. didnt know it would be so stressful la watching it. yes, just watching a bunch of guys i do not know racing is already stressful for me. what more if i go over to pg to watch fadzli, i think i might just be so stressed up, i'd faint. haha!
come to think of it, better not. coz if i do, nobody would be able to carry me in. lol!
so the guy with the green bike won 1st. followed by this elias guy. apparently the 3rd position was so close between this thai rider and an old rider (according to fadzli). so in the end, the old rider won. but seriously, respect to that asian rider la. he maintained till the end actually.

then being the person i am, i made out some storyline for those riders who are really at the back, as in the last few, about the kind of excuses they would give to go back into the paddock and not continue racing. haha! see, when you mix around with lame people, *cough*fadzli*cough*, you'll become one yourself. lol.

anyway, i've got one funny story to share about amni.
the other day, my mom gave her money to get a packet of salt. so when she reached home, my mom was wondering why in the world was the plastic bag she was carrying seemed so heavy. it turns out, well, amni did buy a packet of salt. she bought one whole pack of salt which contained 10 smaller packets of salt. haha!
now my house has over supply of salt. lol!

boring, right?
yeah. life's kinda boring right now.

& i wont be getting the gst offset la. so sad, ok! =(

screw you.

2010-06-27T23:08:00.000+08:00

today's just not my day.

my laptop's screwed up. its lagging like nobody's business & restarts over & over again. blogger's screwed up too (currently blogging on my hp).
facebook decided 2b under maintainence, whatever shit for, i dunno. not as if its getting any better anyway.

lucky i am no longer on twitter. wont b surprised if e whale decides 2 appear now.

& nobody wanna watch england vs germany match with me tonite. fadzli's sleeping. bahhh.

i am a very angry lady today. even chocolates didnt help me cool down. the only plus point for today is dat my mom cooked nasi lemak.

pffft.

bloody hell. i m so damn pissed!
eff it. i m going to sleep.

bye!

forty4.

2010-06-19T14:02:00.021+08:00

we are old. bummer.

so yesterday was the 18th of the month. which also means its our monthsary. 44months; 3years8months.
a long time, no?

so since we werent working, we decided to have a mini celebration. it was raining extremely heavily in the morning so the time for the meeting was postponed. & since fadzli was still asleep by the time i was ready, decided to meet him at his void deck instead of wasting more time for him to come and fetch me.

we decided to go simpang to try out this new western restaurant at simpang bedok.

western chow, where oldies are goodies.
very simple decoration. it gives out the feeling of an old coffeeshop. vintage, i like!
why is it so empty? because it's already after 3pm! haha! continue reading to know why. =P

they are currently having this 1for1 offer for their chicken & fish dishes. this only applies during lunch hour (12pm to 3pm) & since its an 'opening special', i dont think its applicable to their lorong ah soo & bishan branch.

we decided to buy our main courses from this offer.

starter: mashed potato salad with chicken ham. (sgd2.50)
verdict: a cold dish. the colours in a way complimented each other. irrelevant, i know. haha! and the taste itself was ok, i guess. i like it but i would love it if its "richer" in the taste.
note to self: the next time, order without cucumber.

main course:

fadzli's char-grill black pepper chicken. (sgd5.90)
verdict: the size of the chicken is quite big - tender & juicy. & the serving for the sauce was generous enough for the chicken as compared to some places where the sauce is so little, fadzli would always have to ask for extra serving for the sauce. its a lil spicy for kids because the sauce actually have that rich taste of black pepper.

my cheese chicken chop. (sgd6.90)
something different from the normal chicken chops i had. like the above dish, the chicken itself was juicy & tender. maybe because i am too use to having my chicken chops with sauce, it was a little weird for me to have it without sauce. haha! but overall, if you love cheese (like me!), order this because they are not stingy with the cheese on the chicken.
note to self: try asking for sauce at the side the next time. =P

shared cheese beef baked rice.
fadzli's initial plan was to get for each of us. luckily i suggested to actually to see the serving before ordering for individual. haha! standard serving for one. the serving for the beef, sauce and cheese was generous. the taste itself was delicious! its actually plain rice, topped with the beef and the cheese.
for the drinks itself, fadzli had his iced milo dinosaur while i had teh-o limau.

as for the main courses, you could actually choose 2sides to go along with it, ranging from; mashed potato, coleslaw, fries, french beans and rice.
but for the promotional meal itself, the side dish is a standardized of mashed potato and coleslaw.
however, since we were having the potato salad as our starters, we requested for french beans instead of the whipped potato which the manager was nice enough to compromise on. the french beans is actually cooked with butter which really complimented the taste overall. i think i could actually just order the french bean as the side the next time. haha!

generally, the food was delicious with the price of the normal coffee shop western food. the total spent was sgd21.40.
the only downside was the drinks came a little too late, as in we were served with our starters first then the drinks came a few minutes after. & they gotten my drink wrong - instead of teh-o limau, they served me teh-o iced limau. but it was immediately rectified.

a few snapshots while eating.

so after we're done with our meal, we needed some time to digest the food. haha! while waiting for fadzli to digest his food, i went over to this vintage corner they had to snap some photos.

"hello? hello?"
by the time i am done snapping photos, we talked for awhile more before making our move.

we didnt know they were supposed to close at 3pm so fadzli & myself were just taking our own sweet time eating and by the time we were done, it was already 4pm or so. but unlike some places where they will actually roll down one side of their shutters, they actually left it just like that & only brought it down when we were out for about 5mins afterwards. not only that, before leaving the premises, i was busy snapping photos of their vintage corner when one of the waiters actually came up to me and told me a brief history of the restaurant itself.

speaks alot for their customer service, eh? =)

let's just save the brief history of the restaurant itself for another day. =)

after our scrumptious late lunch, we went next door for some karaoke.
i think we've been going there once a month since we officially became members of cash studio. haha!

karaoke-ing with a sore throat, blocked nose and toothache is highly unrecommended. i couldnt even sing properly because i cant sing those high pitch without coughing my lungs out. kns.

and as per normal, we had the big room just for the 2 of us & really buat macam rumah sendiri la. especially fadzli.

see what i mean?

orang tengah sibuk menyanyi, ni anak sibuk amek gambar.

so songs after songs were sang. & before we know it, it was already time for us to go. so not having enough during the session, we actually extended for another hour. haha. gila punya keje.

so by the time we were really done,
went over to a coffee shop near sph to watch world cup. came late to catch the 730pm match so we just stayed and had a hot drink each while passing time for the 10pm match. i was with my laptop, macam bookie. haha! imagine a tudung girl becoming a bookie. haha!

so were joined by fadzli's friends afterwards and also that stupid friend of his that i really do not like came. urrgh!
tengok muka dia je da meluat can!
i dont care if to you i am being petty or whatever. because i didnt like him to begin with and he just have to make thing worst by his stupid comments.
yes, i bear grudges. so?
i dun dislike him anymore la. i totally hate him.

see, the thing about me is, yes, i may dislike you even without knowing you. but once i know you, my perception may totally change. this actually happened to some of fadzli's other friends.
when i dislike you, i may just be quiet, not saying anything or whatever.
but once i start to hate you, i will actually show it & i dont care already la. something like, 'screw you' kinda attitude.

alah, da la. dont care already la.
bye!

pulau blakang mati.

2010-06-17T14:13:00.004+08:00

we went green on the 2nd of june. in 3d.
it was a day for shrek ever after in 3d with fadzli & the kids at e-hub.

and after which, it was a few games of bowling. i think i more or less figure out outings with the kids, movie & bowling. haha! almost always the same every other time. lol!

check out the 5pounds houseball.

with 5 holes for the finger!
so after that game of bowling, went around & did a little bit of shopping for the kids before going home. =)

morning of 11th june was spent with fadzli at bukit merah to check out the bike. joined by sharul afterwards. then went over to pasir ris to fetch amirul for a movie. amirah was not around because she's with the mother. intital plan was to actually watch the karate kid but it was almost full house so we ended up watching the a-team.

muka aku stress pasal panas sangat. haha!
luckily, we actually bought the tickets prior to picking amirul up because when we finally got to e-hub to buy our popcorn, the crowd was horrible!

see what i mean?
so while queueing up for the popcorns & whatnots, we managed to snap some pictures.

>frankly speaking, when fadzli first recommended a-team to watch, i thought i would sleep through the movie. because i've never watched the series. but i didnt! i thoroughly enjoyed the whole movie. action & comedy. & the black guy character is super cute can! even amirul enjoyed himself.

see, even amirul enjoyed the movie sampai muncung mulut makan popcorn.
june 12th was spent with fadzli & amirul doing touristy stuff. haha!
went to sentosa since fadzli had passes for entrance to sentosa, luge/skyride & songs of the sea.
we totally forgot about it actually and it was really a last minute outing as the passes expire on the 14th of june.

went for a little grocery shopping the night after our date. bought some stuff for the the food i am supposed to prep for our sentosa outing.

initial plan was only to prep egg mayo & tuna mayo. but the morning itself when i went to the market, i bought 1kg worth of hor fun and fried it to be brought along for sentosa.

met over at serangoon nel line.

but i was late because i forgot about my camera's battery. haha! silly me. i was charging the battery the night before and totally forgot to put it into my camera in the morning.

so we took the train down to harbourfront and made our way to sentosa express.

omgoodness! the crowd was huge la! but lucky for us, we do not have to queue to get the tickets for sentosa express.

since we were all hungry, we made our way to the beach & realise that we didnt bring any mat so we couldnt sit by the beach. bummer.
but before we reaching our spot, we snapped some photos.

& when we reached the beach, we snapped more!

our pathetic lunch. haha!
made by yours truly.

clockewise from top:
fried horfun, tuna mayo & egg mayo
after our fulfilling lunch, we hang out for abit more before going for our skyride & luge.
i was actually changing my mind about going on the luge because i had no confidence in controlling that thing. but after a pep talk by fadzli, i just braved myself.

in the end, though i am tad slower that fadzli & amirul, i still completed the luge! yay! & amirul like some f1 racer la when he drove the luge. lol.

so walked back to beach station to quench our thirst. sat at coffee bean for apple caramel for myself. & fadzli had banana caramel. for amirul, he had his magnum ice cream.

sungguh comot can!
so we took the tram to siloso beach where we had a few photoshoot session before going for our songs of the sea.

monyet jadi-jadian...
dan anaknya. =P
after a few more shots, we took the shuttle service back to beach station where we queued for the songs of the sea.

& we took photos with the ugly looking fish, oscar, the supposedly star of the songs of the sea. haha!

amirul with his blinking kanye west glasses.
us. =)
after the songs of the sea, we took the sentosa express back to vivocity where we hang around for awhile at the skygarden.

& to finish up the leftover food. because i am too lazy to bring home the containers. haha!
maha pemalas! i know! =P

so yeah,
after the food's finished, we made our way back to the harbourfront mrt station & went home sweet home.

fadzli & amirul sent me to my void deck first & then they took the cab back to pasir ris.

16th of june was a rainy day. i am sure alot of you have seen the video of orchard road being flooded.
it was an extremely lazy day for me, i didnt even want to get up if i had a choice. haha!
fadzli & myself were supposed to meet but due to fadzli reaching home late due to a stupid reason (haha!) and since it was raining really heavily, we contemplated for awhile.

then suddenly fadzli called me to ask if i've taken my bathe, which i have not (haha!). because his family & himself are going bowling & fadzli came up with a bright idea of me joining them. -_-
so i had to bathe & meet them over at nrscc for bowling.

had a few games & i totally suck! =(
so after which, we got into the car & went back.
& i helped fadzli shaved his head. haha!

so since today fadzli's supposed to be on morning shift & i am supposed to wake amni up early in the morning, we ended the date quite early.

so yeah,
that's about it i guess. =)

when the going gets tough.

2010-06-10T15:58:00.005+08:00

dearest fadzli

i wish there's more i could do for you besides just being a listening ear & a shoulder for you to cry on. i wish i could understand certain things you tell me besides just acknowledging & nodding my head because i know nuts about those topics due to my almost zilch interest in it.

your dreams are so near to you now. somehow, i feel real bad for not being able to ease your monetary burden with regards to your bike. i know how much you want to race, & i know how irritated you were the first time i went to pasir gudang with you. the fact that you could only stand at the sideline watching the bikes zooming pass by when it could be you in the race too is very much frustrating.

the fact that due to some people's busybody-ness at work, your arrangements for you to achieve your dream is now on the line. i know its easy for me to tell you that all this that happened is a blessing in disguise but its not easy for you because you are the one who have to go through it. & now, you've to start all over again, back to square one.

frankly, i am pissed too, because indirectly, i've to get a gist of it from what you told me on the phone last night. we wont be able to have our short random dates after your morning shift. we wont be able to enjoy those days you'd be able to claim your off days due to extra duties.

but you know what? dont give up on your dreams just because of this one hurdle. you can make it, ok? i know that you're one strong person - physically & mentally. i know you'd be able to do it, you'd be able to work around it.

& i know we'd be able to make it, ok.

like i told you before,
its just us against the world.

i ♥ you, baby.

56th

2010-06-09T10:13:00.000+08:00

today is the 9th of june.

happy birthday mommy dearest!

xoxo.

maybe its time for miracles.

2010-06-01T13:32:00.011+08:00

happy belated vesak day to those who celebrated it last friday.

ouh wells,
its already the 1st of june.
half of 2010 just zoomed by, just like that. dont you think so?
time passes so scarily fast these days, i do not know if i have really lived my life.
next thing you know, its gonna be 2011 and when you looked back at 2010, you will question yourself what you have achieved for 2010.
*shudders*

anyways,
last friday, on vesak day itself, fadzli's brother got married to his sweetheart.
eh, actually, i dont want to sibuk-sibuk but eh, i thought i could escape (haha!) but fadzli's mother personally invited me for his solemnization & reception itself.
haha! cannot escape. =p

so before the solemnization, fadzli picked me up & we went over to pasir ris before heading down to the girl's place which was at bukit gombak. haha! i've never been there man! well, except for work, but that was only once and it was only at the mrt station.

according to fadzli's caption for this particular photo on fb,
"Posing mcm dpt ijazah.. LOL!".
such a mean brother, right? tsk!

so that ended after maghrib & we hung around because there were guests. and slightly after that, we made a move to the aunt's place to decorate the wedding car.

ok la. i didnt do the decoration. it was done by fadzli, his parents & aunt.
i was at the aunty's place, watching tv with the kids, uncle & the maids. haha!
maha pemalas.
not really la. i was warned that the carpark is hot so rather i make myself uncomfortable at the carpark, might as well i take care of the kids at home, right? =)

so the decoration and stuff ended at 9plus.

the next day,
same arrangement.
picked up by fadzli, head to pasir ris.
& before heading down to location, we had pizza! haha! first time ever before a wedding reception, i had pizza. =p

there were some cock-up in the event.
the kompang guys were late for one bloody hour! super kecoh, ok.
the bride was already at the dais, and the groom had to wait for the kompang in the car before heading down to the reception. kns!

anyway,
they didnt want to pay the kompang. haha!
i mean, seriously, if they are late for at most 15mins, i think its still acceptable la. this is like one bloody hour la.
the brother was pissed because his managers/colleagues were not able to see him during the reception.

& it was worse because the kompang guys didnt have the initiative to even call to inform that they're gonna be late. instead the best man had to call them then they actually informed that they were gonna be late.
so merepek, can!

only had photos during the cake cutting ceremony. bummer.
the cake's pretty. maybe because its pink. haha! i am bias like that. =p

congratulations firdaus & liz! enjoy your honeymoon in bali!
fadzli's next scheduled race is on the 20th and he's pretty pissed because one problem after another came up for his bike after the accidednt. apparently, one of the endcap dented or something like that and it is too short a notice for him to get a new one. so in the end, he had this done for his bike...

lol!
but ouh wells,
hopefully things go well & he'd be able to race this 20th.
if not, i tell you, he's gonna fret about it for like 3days after the race. serious! because that was what happened in march. haha!

& to fadzli,

"i cant promise to fix all your problems but i can promise you wont have to face them alone"
i may not have the financial capability or knowledge to help you in your racing dreams but be rest assured, i'll always be here to listen & acknowledge. =)
even though most of the time, i dont understand a thing you explained to me. =p

no title.

2010-05-25T20:15:00.002+08:00

last tuesday was my last update.
haha!
one week. ok la, not so bad. =)

i cant really remember what happened for the past one week though.
same old shit, i guess.

i reckon nothing major really happened thus explaining why i cant remember things that happened in the past week. =p
except maybe fadzli & i turned 43months on the 18th.
dont think we did anything special on the day itself to commemorate our monthsary but this was one of those rare times when fadzli was the first one to wish happy monthsary between us. haha!
because usually, it would be me. but i guess on that day itself, i was busy with something that it totally slipped my mind.
not that i forgot. its just that i didnt look at the watch so i missed the midnight.

bah.

but ok la. once in a while give face, right? =P

we spent one day of the weekend together. =)
it was a fabulous time when we really had a wonderful time together, without any interruptions. well, almost. heh.
but despite it all, we managed to just ignore the disruption and just continue dedicating the whole time to each other. at that point of time, i just felt like we are just in a bubble, blocking out anything else. it was just me & him.
thats it.

i really love the idea of us just spending our time, just the two of us.
but unfortunately, that does not really come easy for us anymore that how it used to be. we are now both quite tied down with other commitments.
but that does not mean we just waste any available opportunity to meet.
even though if its just for awhile, we would still take that time and meet.

& during those time, i keep quiet.
reason being is not because i've nothing to say to him. but rather, i prefer very much to indulge in that sacred moment i've with him.
our time for each other is so limited now due to some causes.

went for some nasi lemak for supper the other day. over at some place with a weird name.
i swear i cant remember the road name but all i know its around little india.
i swear i think there's something wrong with my tongue these days. i cant take spicy food. omg. so irritating, can?
can u imagine eating nasi lemak without the sambal? tsk!

anyway, the rice was fragrant and delish.
the otak-otak was yummylicious. the chicken too.
dont like the ikan bilis though, because it tasted like its not washed proper before being fried. =\
ended up getting a pack, minus the ikan bilis & sambal, for lunch the day after. =)

frankly speaking right,
i am getting tired and bored of blogging.
how like that?

guess.

2010-05-17T21:53:00.007+08:00

woah. hmm.
ok la. not really a long time since i last blogged. heh.

anyways, nothing much happened since the last update.
work, as usual. events for this week was at eastpoint, which i was at one monday and tuesday.
random meetups with the boy. <3

this is super delish la. mushroom steak, medium rare. =)

the salad that comes with it. =)

fadzli's nasi goreng kampong.

his meal. iced milo grande. haha!
both feeling so damn bloated, walked over to the petrol station to get our drinks to "smuggle" into the next place we were going.

booked a room for two and then we do what do best.

karaoke!
haha.

what were you guys thinking, eh?

went to cashbox studio to sing our hearts content. one song after another.
singing and dancing on the sofa. video recording.
just having plain old fun. =)

still contemplating if i should upload fadzli's singing videos on facebook. heh!

did i also informed you we did a lil shopping in tampines too?

went to tampines1 for some uniqlo.
saw some pretty pretty rings which we plan to buy for our *ehem ehem*.
then went over to isetan where he bought perfumes for me. =)
and also a wallet.

ended the date with a talking session over at kampong park.
where we were greeted by this prc couple who came after us and sat down at the bench diagonaly to us. then they started kissing. and the guy put the girl's hand on his crotch while he use his hand to touch her non-existence boobs.

seriously?
too poor to get a room or what?
super turned off la.

anyways.
baby,

"each (counter clockwise) turn robs the planet of angular momentum, slowing its spin the tiniest bit. lengthening the night, pushing back the dawn. giving me a little more time here with you."

i ♥ you, fadzli.

14th.

2010-05-09T11:50:00.003+08:00

happy 14th birthday to
the princess of rahwom's family,
amni nasyitah rahwom!!!!

xoxo.

lost.

2010-05-09T11:18:00.002+08:00

you know at some point of your life, you just feel so lost.
like everything's falling apart.
you dont know what to do, you dont know who to talk to.
you just keep everything within yourself because you're just, well, lost.
you cant even talk to your other half because you dont know where to start and because he/she is having their own problems.

so you just act like nothing's wrong, everything's fine for you.
you continue being there for other people, lending a listening ear & giving advises.
you smile, you laugh. you joke around.
when the fact is, in your heart & in your mind, its actually a wreck.
you just want to give everything up. but at the same time, you're strong enough not to.

it gets tiring that on nights you cant sleep & on days you're alone, you'll just cry.
& that's the exact reason why you choose to tire yourself so much so you will just end up sleeping the moment you lie down on your bed.

it get worst when people who matters are too blind to look beyond your eyes. because you know if they really looked, they would have known that something's wrong.
but they dont.

5th pair.

2010-05-05T21:23:00.006+08:00

i was sick during the weekend.
fever, headache & puking. blah!
it started from friday actually. and it dragged on till monday.
i hate being sick on a weekend.

but still,
it was spent with fadzli.

fadzli was such a dear to actually meet me after his night shift just because i was sick and i wanted one of my comfort food.

so he picked me up, me with fever and all & we went over to adam's corner.

bubor taiwan ftw!

sunday;
went for a wedding over in pasir ris with fadzli.
weather sungguh tak favourite!
it was so scorching hot, it just worsen my already bad headache.
so, me being me, whenever i have a bad headache, i get easily agitated.
so i got irritated at every single little thing.
for example:
the people eating slowly,
the people who are not eating yet sitting at the table,
fadzli asking me twice whether i want to sit at the empty seats only getting the seats occupied by others (baby, i know you meant well but you know i can be extra bitchy when i have my migraine, right?),
and many many more stuff la.

the food was nice but just not my kind of food la.
never was a big fan of briyani. haha!

something funny happened when i was taking the dessert though.
initiaolly when i was at the dessert table, it was empty, nobody was at the dessert table.
then, suddenly, alot of people was taking dessert.
so there was this fruit tarts which i wanted to take for fadzli & myself but i decided not to.
why?
coz you know the difference between a dessert plate and the normal plate? dessert plate is like half size smaller than the normal plate, right?
so you imagine this chinese lady, super nicely dressed, holding a normal plate and filling it up with the fruit tarts.
haha!
i wanted to laugh so much so decided to just make do with the ice jelly cocktail and a few kuehs.

kiasuim everywhere sey!

after the wedding, went over to tampines one coz fadzli wanted to get something from uniqlo.
plan was to get something for himself there.
went out of uniqlo with fadzli $170 poorer and stuff for both him & me.
haha!

sales are evil!

but considering the number of things we got,
kira ok la tu.
i think. =\

so went searching for drinks.
its difficult when u have a couple who is like a tong air, you know.
bought a 1.5l bottle of h-two-o. sungguh unglam walking around drinking from a big bottle sey.
lol. kns.

and went to this steel jewellery shop because fadzli decided to get something.

yeah, its our 5th couple ring in 3.5years.

since no ring actually "caught" my eyes & the rings that fadzli liked are all female sizes (haha!), we decided to go for something different this time.
it was a squarish ring. haha!
but ok la. simple but nice. =)

went back to his place after that to watch motogp. again.
played around with the kids for a while also.
then the headache decided to strike and i was so moody that i just tried to sleep it away.

thanks fadzli for understanding because once his motogp was done, he actually rushed to get ready to send me home.
but at the same time, so sorry baby!

decided to drop by lorong ah soo for a while to have a hot drink.
i realise i do not like hot horlicks at all but i love iced horlicks. heh!
i also had my comfort food!

hotplate beancurd.
you know food that makes you feel 'better' just by eating it?
yep, this is another one of mine. =)

thanks baby for the weekend. appreciate it, loads.

♥ ♥ ♥

xoxo.

bliss.

2010-04-27T20:43:00.003+08:00

sunday was spent with fadzli. =)

first,
we head down to amoy street for the office warming party.
coz you see, my office just shifted from mosque street to amoy street. prior to working here, i dont even know the existence of these 2 streets. haha!

i wanted to take photos of the party itself but once we started eating, it slipped my mind.
lol!
thanks baby for coming over & getting along with some of my colleagues.
i appreciate it, loads. love you!

the spread of food which was delish! especially the youtiao and the prawn. omg!

very important systems we live by. haha!

muka serious nampak, bang! lol!
we didnt stay long though because we had to attend a wedding of fadzli's friend.
so can you imagine the bike journey from amoy street to tampines. haha!
& we thought we were late la.
turns out sharul & wady were even later. lol!

so met a few more of their friends over at the wedding.
ouh. and i saw that one particular friend of his that i dislike. haha!
long story la on why i super dislike him. maybe will blog about it another time.
he kept looking, so look lor. not as if i am going to make the first move into tegur-ing you lor. step on my toes again la. kns.

anyway,
so during the wedding, shared a table with ijo & took photos! =)

random shot. lol.

us on fadzli's glitter-glitter helmet.

with ijo. stupid wind blow my tudung making it senget. so unglam. =(

this is what happen when you try to get a group of guys to take A photo.

ok. finally. haha!
in general, the wedding was nice.
except for one thing - the dj.
omg! super lame, long winded and out of topic, can!
i think he was trying to get interaction but absolute fail!
when people are karaoke-ing, he will interrupt with stupid and irrelevant comments. irritating!
then there was this one segment like an "interview" segment. so he was interviewing the parents of the groom together with the couple. so he was asking things like what make the parents good parents in law and what makes the bride a good daughter in law/wife. and these questions were posed to the bride. i mean like, wtf. i dont know how to explain la but yeah, something like that.

so anyway, after almost 2.5hrs there, we decided to make a move to one of the guys' place to watch motor sports on star sports.
haha!
anith and motor sports. or rather, anith and star sport.
lol!
but i survived almost 3hours, ok!
so proud of myself. heh.

and this friend of theirs stays in choa chu kang.
lol!
mintak my butt cramp only.
which was what happened la by the time we got to choa chu kang from tampines. haha!
but not only my butt la but also my leg. haha!
because fadzli changed the footrest to racing footrest so kaki mintak kena bengkok lebih. lol.

so yeah.
taking into consideration that i had to work on monday, as well as fadzli being on the morning shift, we had to leave quite early.
seemed like the time passed by very quickly la. =(

kinda true, isnt it?

not profitable.

2010-04-23T21:18:00.005+08:00

past few days have been spent with the bf.
thanks for entertaining me these past few days. appreciate it, loads.

due to some unforseen circumstancse,
i didnt go to work for almost the whole week, except for monday.
feeling a lil too nag out also.
so the one week break did me good, alhamdullilah.
especially fadzli was around so in one way or another, he managed to make things right also.

we watched monga one of the days.

a predictable storyline but it is our kinda show.
gangster and all.
& somehow or rather, despite the predictable storyline & all, it is still a wonderful movie. the setting, the action, the cute-in-a-cina-kind guys in the show. lol. especially monk. haha. definitely my kind of guy. lol. dragon looks kinda "faggoty". mosquito has this boy-next-door look, like a good guy kinda look, definitely not my kind. haha!
so monk it is. haha!

btw, monk's the guy on the right. mosquito's on the left. dragon is the guy to monk's right. not the old guy la, of course. the old guy's boss geta who is also dragon's dad.
so, i am sure many would agree that monk's hot, right? haha!

a movie i will definitely purchase the dvd when its out, insya'allah. =)

ouh!
& we had arnold's too! like super yum can!
of course, as per normal, we were not able to finish the food.
and we purchse this hair removal thing.
you know the one that you see at the advertisements on fb at the sidebar.
the one apparently works like sandpaper. haha!
ya, we actually gave into our curiosity to see if the product really works & spent 6bucks (i think) buying it from 7-11.

verdict?
well, it works perfectly well with fine hair.
we tried it on fadzli's legs though but it doesnt work on the "coarse" hair.
haha!
and fadzli couldnt stop telling me about how smooth it feels la. haha. but when i suggested to do it to his whole leg, he doesnt want to.
haha!
tak rock arh you! =P

accompanied him to do up his bike also in jaybee. haha!
love the aloe vera drink like alot alot. yummy!
yang, besok you masok jb again beli kan i air tu lagi, can? heh.

ouh,
& i bought this double chocolate donut from dunkin donuts in jb.
kns.
its not double la! its effing triple la.
coz i thought it was just the donut itself, which is chocolate, with the chocolate coating on top.
kns.
i ate the donut then there's chocolate cream inside the donut itself.
manis mintak ampun! bole kena potong kaki sey!
i think many knows how i cant take sweet stuff and that donut was SUPER sweet, i tell you!
headache for awhile.
had to walk to the nearby petrol station to get a bottle of mineral water.

and it had to rain, like real heavily.
complete with lightning & thunder.
basket.
i hate thunders. it makes me "jump".
thank you baby for standing beside me during that moment even though i know you're itching to kepo kepo see see look look at what they're doing to your bike. haha!

got a kentalan raincoat too. haha!
so kental la the raincoat. lol!

plans of eating in jb had to be cancelled due to the rain so we ended up eating in singapore.
went hawa and had their nasi goreng ayam.
which tasted like, urmmmm, i dont know.
there's no taste at all la. not nice. =(
and the chicken's pathetically so little. =(
and it cost $4.50. which i think is seriously not worth it all la!
unless of course you dont mind eating the rice, which is soooooo much!

should have just walked a little further to the front to mr. teh tarek.
bahhh.
tu arh. malas sangat kan.

ok la.
i think that's about it.
hmm.

i am actually planning to "test paint" the helmet i have at home with poster colour.
but fadzli told me must sandpaper the helmet and all. ok, tu part aku malas. haha!
but the thought of painting the helmet somehow spark the interest in me. maybe can do tag team with fadzli. he can sand the helmet then i do the painting.
ok yang, on tak?
u sand, i paint.
team work mah! =P

xoxo.

threepointfive.

2010-04-18T15:29:00.007+08:00

its the 18th!
so what's with the 18th?
its our monthsary!

& since today is the 18th of april,
its our 42nd monthsary;
its our 3.5yrs.

woah!
long eh?
screw you people who said we wont make it through!
screw you people who laughed when we had that 3months break!
screw you people who still think that we wont be together!
screw you people who tells me that i deserve someone better than him (&vice versa)!
screw you people who.......... urrrgh. forget it.

happy thoughts. happy thoughts. happy thoughts.

since fadzli couldnt take leave today because of some dont know not enough manpower,
we took advantage of the fact i couldnt work yesterday to celebrate an advanced monthsary. =)

lunch was at

tang tea house.
believe it or not, it was our first time here.
we usually skipped this place when we are at simpang because fadzli heard its not nice.
i, on the other hand, have always wanted to try it out despite what fadzli has heard.
coz i am the kind of person who would want to try it out rather than hear it from others.
& just so happen that since it was our monthsary, fadzli gave in to me & we went there to have our lunch.

food galore!
pardon the photos with lines. no idea whats with the camera phone.
& sorry i cant put the name of the dishes because i seriously forgot the names.

verdict?
it was fine what! not tremendously delicious but its nice!
i mean the way fadzli described the way other people saying its not nice is like macam really not nice la.

and so afterwards,
went somewhere where only members are allowed.

karaoke la! apa lagi!
stress pe muka tgh nyanyi. haha!
ni baru dinamakan "buat macam rumah sendiri". sejuk dok!
trying out the self timer. haha!
i shall never allow fadzli to choose songs for me when we are at the karaoke. because he will surely choose those old school songs that i dont know punya. kns.
then laugh at me when i dont know how to sing.
sorry la kanak-kanak 70's. i ni 80's kid la so i dont know most of the songs. haha!

so afterwards, we decided to go to downtown east for some bowling.
but plans had to be cancelled and we ended up slacking at his house.
simply beause of the sudden heavy rain.

omg!
the weather so unpredictable can!
it was such a wonderful weather then suddenly hujan. kalau gerimis takpe, ni suddenly heavy downpour.

ended the day with some tv watching while eating pizza.
bliss.

so baby, will you hold my hand?
shall end this post with my favourite photo for the day. =)

iloveyou.

coz its funny like that.

2010-04-15T21:09:00.021+08:00

these days has been interestingly interesting.
i've met a couple of weird people on the streets. haha.

you know,
i'll always go like,
"hi sir/miss! dont worry! i am not selling anything, just representing XXX!"

so here are the interesting replies i managed to get from the members of the public.

at dhoby ghaut, 12042010;
guy: yes you are.
me: i am what?
guy: you said you're not selling. but you are selling.
me: no, i am not.
guy: yes you are.
me: no, i am not. i am here just to create public awareness & fundraising.
guy: ya, so you are selling.
me: no, i am not selling anything, sir. its fundraising where we collect funds for XXX. and if fundraising equates to selling to you, then by all means. ok, thanks! bye!

at raffles place, 15042010;
(sandra & myself happened to approach the same person)
lady: no. i think you should go & die
(said while looking at sandra & myself)

at raffles place, 15042010;
guy: you spoke to me yesterday.
me: but i wasnt here yesterday.
guy: yes you were. you spoke to me. so i already know.
me: no, i was a dhoby ghaut yesterday. maybe you saw me at dhoby ghaut.
guy: no, you were here yesterday. u spoke to me yesterday.
me: huh?! ok, as long as you are happy sir. thanks!

wah. kns.
haha! funny people la.
& these people are only the few of them.

***************
sweet ke pe.
haha. literally sweet also.
manis mintak potong kaki punya manis ni bende.
its just one of the "just because" i got for fadzli on monday. =)
i am always full of "just because" surprises. ouh wells. a simple "thank you" will do but sometimes i wish for "just because" surprises for me too. ouh wells.
had our dinner of hor fun, chicken rice & fried baby squid while watching adnan sempit & pisau cukor.
i also dont know how many times i've watched the shows.
fadzli, lagi la. i think the script for the whole adnan sempit pun he knows already.

what else eh. hmm.

after tuition on tuesday, instead of sending me home by bike as per normal, fadzli had to drive because it was raining so heavily all of a sudden. it was like, we were just getting ready to leave with the helmets & all. at the same time in my head i was thinking of where we can go. then suddenly, it rained heavily.
had to send me home straight because of some things. because usually, after tuition would be our "alone" time where we will like go somewhere for supper or coffee or just sitting around, just the 2 of us. but not for that night. so yeah.

the only pit stop we had was at serangoon central where i bought my whipped potato.
but not satisfied enough la because the actual whipped potato i would like to eat is popeye's. chet. maybe one of these days i can get it myself. haha!
macam macam arh kau!

the other day i was out with fadzli.
haha! whats new.
went over to kallang macdees to have a talk.
serious discussions, ok. haha!
omg! anith having serious discussion. something which rarely happens. lol.
so over our respective meals, we had this serious discussion. just talks, no confirmations. whether or not it will happen, well, we can only plan, ya. by the end of the day, its up to Him to decide.
insya'allah.

then later on joined by 2 of his friends & they started talking on topics i have no idea on. haha!
tried to join in the conversation but i failed miserably. so ended up, i just dok-diam-diam-tgk-org-makan-fries-minum-juice. heh. watched the stupid soccer match on tv and just people watch. alahai.
then more of his friends came with their respective wives. but obviously i didnt stay on la. cannot arh.
coz da malam what. the next day i work morning, y'know. i cant function if i dont have enough hours of sleep these days.
not enough hours of sleep = anith unable to function.
not that i will be cranky or whatever but more on my brains will be at pentium 1.
haha!

now i feel like eating mcwings.
kns.

shall we? =)

losing it.

2010-04-07T22:14:00.007+08:00

i think i've lost my mojo for blogging.
lol.

anyways,
i really have no idea on what to update on.
blame twitter. haha.

i sprained my damn right ankle yesterday,
chasing someone who is not meant to be mine.
and hurts pretty damn bad.
really sucky man!
and the person didnt even stop for me la. kns.

went to fadzli's place after work to teach amirul while waiting for him to knock off from work.
then, it was bowling! yay!

dengan confident i told my colleagues when they were asking if i was sure about going bowling due to my sprained ankle that bowling needs hand, not feet.

apparently, i forgot at that point of time that bowling requires my footing too.
basket.
so scores were extremely for me that night.
i am not that fantastic in bowling but that night, it was the extreme bad.

anyways,
one of the days when we went dating,
i cant really recall how we ended up at lorong ah soo.
had dinner/supper of fried baby squid and hot plate tofu (which was a huge serving for a small price). and it was yummy, ok!
and fadzli bought something for my hp!

ouh yes! its in pink. =)

followed fadzli to his team chalet the other day.
haha!
i made myself useful, ok by skewing the sotong balls and cutting fruits.
no photos though. no idea why.
& i love whatever the chicken farhana cooked, albeit too spicy for me. haha!
& i love bbq chicken! & bbq stingray!

at times like this, i just want to organise a bbq for me to eat those kind of food.
haha!

i may hate mozzies.

but i'll always love you. =)

haha!
ok, last part's totally random.

hai.na.nese.

2010-04-03T17:04:00.009+08:00

semalam aku pergi dating.
dengan matair aku la, of course!

i was craving for hainanese chicken rice.
to which fadzli with much confidence, said there was this hainanese chicken rice restaurant at e-hub. i thought we'd eat the hainanese chicken rice at banquet je but since the boy was confident enough of the place, so why not.

turns out the place was not halal. -_-

being the lazybums we are, we ended up having lunch at bbq chicken instead.
far from hainanese chicken rice.

had a feast,
complete with soup, salad, starters, main course and dessert.
haha!
mana tak pipi goldfish!

and you know how people go dating they talk to communicate with each other?
we communicate too, but not by talking.
we were commenting on each other's statuses on fb via hp to communicate while waiting for our food to be served. & even when the food's served, we were still commenting on each other's statuses. -_-
lame much?

last minute plan of watching a movie.
initially wanted to watch 'when in rome' but the seats were so limited, we decided to go for 'whip it' instead.
which was really worth it, i tell you. should go and watch it, ok!
except for some irritating creatures in the cinema who dont seem to understand the basic concept of silencing your hp. kns.

then we saw there was like a popular mega sale at d'tent to which we decided to go.
yessar!

ok la. initial plan was to get english books for amirul and amirah.
but of course, those who knows me would know that when it comes to books, i can go crazy!
so since it was like 5 books for 20bucks, fadzli bought like 4 books for me, another 6 for amirul & amirah. thanks baby!
& of course not forgetting assessments for amirul.
here's hoping that amirul wont hate me for psychoing his dad into getting english assessments for him. =\

speaking of which, i need to look for my english dictionary for amirul's use.

so we dropped by his place to keep the books.
& fadzli being fadzli, of course showed off his new tv in his room.
haha.
yes, the same tv i spent i think close to 2hrs at tampines courts with him & his parents last sunday, waiting for him to make up his mind.

i am done. =)
no pictures of our date though.
but here's a special message for fadzli.

& even after all these years,
even after all the shit we've been through,
even after all the pain we had to go through,
because we still had our great times,
& we still had our laughter and smiles.
<3

perhaps, perhaps, perhaps.

2010-04-01T23:54:00.005+08:00

ouh wells.
at the rate i am blogging, i might as well just stop altogether.

its april already.
omgwtfh. time seems to be zooming pass. its going to be mid year soon.
then it'd be 2011.
whether we'd still be around to witness all that, its not up for us to decide, yes?

anyway,
few days ago,
fadzli and myself went badoque for a late dinner.
him after his am shift and me, after my work, ok course.

service was fab.
the food was delish. loved the starter. garlic chilli chuka, which was basically baby squid. it was delish!
too bad i forgot to snap a phot of it because i was too busy finishing it off! haha!

fadzli's slab of steak.
the steak was humongous. & according to the menu, their steak is thus far the biggest steak that is served.

my chicken khuzee.
susah la nak makan. haha! i dont really like it though.

fadzli's sam dol.

my mint chai.
very refreshing!
i forgot to take a picture of our starter. =(
but we can always go back there, ya! =)

anyway, this was also the night i got pissed with one of fadzli's friends.
well, to begin with, i never liked him anyway. so yeah, just because of what he did, he has just successfully made me dislike him even more.

kns.

anyways,
i've some people asking me why am i back with fadzli.
i've some people who do not like the idea of me being back with fadzli.
& i've a few people who were happy for me.

the thing is,
its just matters of the heart.
i personally, do not know if this is going to work out.
but of course i would want it to work out. both of us wants this to work out this time. it's just the decision is in god's hands.

& i wont lie telling you people that things has been smooth sailing for both fadzli & i after our patch up. no, it has not.
we still have our arguments here & there. but we did try to talk things out eventually.
its not easy, really. especially considering the things that happened during our 3months "break". what happened during that time, i think only lynn knows about it. she was the only one who saw me cry talking about it while in front of the rest of you, i put up a strong front.
and if lynn can be happy for me, why cant the rest of you?

to those who are happy and are supportive of my decision,
i really thank you so much.

& to those who are not,
all i am asking for is for your support.
if it is something you're not able to give, its fine too. just dont make it known to me.

because by the end of the day,
am i not responsible for my own happiness?
thanx!

gaga ooh lala.

2010-03-27T10:37:00.005+08:00

fadzli crashed badly 2 weekends ago during one of the trackdays. yep.
the bike's in a pretty bad condition, worst than the crash in march 2009. he's pretty devastated because when that happened, it simply meant that he was not able to take part in the raceday on last weekend.

haha. super terok, right?
dont mean to be mean by laughing la but check out the damn pipe la!
but thank god, it just the bike. nothing major happened to him.
true the cost of the repair would be a whole damn lot but duit boleh carik pe.

so instead, on the weekend for the supposed race, we went to pg to give support to his other friend in the racing team. haha.
i dont have any photos because, urmm, it was hot and i think most of you should know my love-hate rship with the sun. so i didnt really leave the paddock dunno what la.
but i still go over to the wall to see the race sometimes, ok.

i love this photo.
ooooh. & i made new acquaintances.
& ended the day with a pretty bad migraine after that. heh.

what else have we done so far?
uurrrmmm.

ouh yes!
we went karaoke!

at cashbox simpang bedok. because i had the free for the first 3hour card. and we are now a proud members of cash studio simpang bedok. haha.
so what did we do at karaoke?
nyanyi arh! apa lagi.
heh.

we also went out with the kids one of those days. =)

watched a movie, took the cadbury ferris wheel, played bowling.
all in pasir ris.

my memory's failing me.
i cant remember, damn it!

saudade.

2010-03-23T14:54:00.006+08:00

anyways,
this is an entry. a super long-ass entry which might or might not bore you to death.
so if you think you've not more than 10minutes to spare, maybe you can come back next time.

as per an entry dated on the 17th december 2009 titled "confession",
i made a public announcement that i've broken up with my then-bf of 3yrs plus by the name of mohd. fadzli.

i didnt state the reason why the break up happened. and yes, i was heartbroken, despite the fact that it was me who asked for it.

matters got worst when less than a month after the break up,
he confessed to me about him being in love with another girl.
he didnt want to tell me who the girl was. but somehow or rather, my gut feeling told me that it was this particular girl.

a few days after that confession made by fadzli,
the girl broke up with the bf.
fadzli & herself got together shortly.

at that point of time, truth be told, my whole world went crumbling down.
yes, fadzli was not a perfect boyfriend. neither was i the perfect girlfriend.
but the fact that we went through a whole lot of shit those 3yrs plus together, well, i thought it would mean something to him.
but seeing his FB status, sounding so happy that she has finally accepted him to be her bf, i was feeling pretty much fucked up. but all i could do was to congratulate the both of them via his FB status though at that point of time, he still didnt want to tell me who she is.
but somewhere along the way, i found out my gut feeling was right.
it was hard, trying to be a friend to him.
i tried. but i will always end up crying when i get home after every single meeting with him. not because we argued but because it hurts, too damn much.
it doesnt help that he told me he still loves & care for me but yet, he was with her.

the situation was too complicated & too heartbreaking for me.
but what am i to do.

and it was during this time,
i got to know a guy who knew what i was going through.

but despite all that, i could never accepted when he asked me to be his.
because by the end of the day,
my heart has no place for anyone new.
that was the fact that he could accept but i couldnt give.
i felt it was unfair for him.
how can you be in a rship with some you dont love? & even worst when you are still in love with your ex?
i couldnt move on because i knew that fadzli still loves me.
maybe i was just being silly then thinking that fadzli & myself will somehow get back together again.

14th to 18th of feb came. i felt worst than ever.
because its those 4days that holds sentimental values for fadzli & myself.
i was feeling like shit, i tell you.

i was so full of angst, so full of emotions.
i just wanted revenge.
i wanted to break them up, not to get together with him.
but to just break them up because the thought of them being together just angered me.

psycho bitch much?
but i didnt do it of course.
just the thoughts playing around in my head.

then, he messaged me one day,
to tell me they've broke up.
the reason why? shall not disclose.
let it be between both of them & myself to know why.
but at that point of time i've given up.
maybe i've given up on the hopes of us getting together.
i dont know. i wasnt sure myself.

so i was there for him as a friend.
& it was during this point of time we went out,
as friends & nothing more.
no 'i love you', no holding of hands.
just out like 2 normal friends do.

& according to my previous post before this, the one full of smiley faces,
i spent my sunday with someone. which ended on a sweet note.

yes.
fadzli & myself decided to give this another try.
will it work out this time?
frankly speaking, i am not sure myself.
if it works, it will.
if it doesnt, then it wont.
whatever it is, at least we can both say that we did try our best.

so baby,
its us against the world.
once again.

=)

2010-03-08T10:58:00.003+08:00

weekends were fab. =)
really.

saturday just came into office for the morning meeting and to witness zaman's long awaited team manager promotion!
congrats zaman! you totally deserve it bro!
hope you love those fab presents! =)

didnt go down to field on saturday because i already hit my target for the week. =)
so decided to head down to have a celebratory lunch for zaman with the people over at vivo.
yummish! =)

and after that went over to grandlink for a karaoke session with the normal people. =)
sang like we've never sang before. and headed down to pasir rish for pris' birthday chalet.

happy 21st birthday babygirl! =)
great time over at the chalet with the people from work. haha!
& it feels great, you know, not talking about work after work. =)

sunday was a blast too. =)
spent the whole day out with a certain somebody. =)
and towards the end, it was wonderful. =)

this entry is so full of smiles.
seriously,
when was the last time you saw an entry of mine which has lotsa smiley faces?

=)

hawau u?

2010-02-27T07:07:00.004+08:00

oooo.
blog's dead, yes?

been busy la.
busy with my work.
busy with my personal life, in a way.

things so far?

work wise, it has been wonderful. ouh yes!

personal life?
eh. no comments actually.
only things are pretty much complicated for me. like, seriously.
you know where you're in a situation where you do not know if you should go left or right?
yup. that's how things on a personal level has been for me.
so how like that?

e.

2010-02-18T00:02:00.001+08:00

40 months ago, today.
you asked me to be yours.

d.

2010-02-17T00:18:00.000+08:00

40 months ago, today.
you asked about my feelings towards you.
i asked you the same.

c.

2010-02-16T00:34:00.002+08:00

40 months ago, today.
we spent the whole day texting each other.
& it was the first time you told me you miss me.

b.

2010-02-15T12:01:00.000+08:00

40 months ago, today.
we went on our first official date.

a.

2010-02-14T00:26:00.000+08:00

40 months ago, today.
we met for the very first time after months of communicating via msn, texts & phonecalls.

heh.

2010-02-14T00:02:00.001+08:00

the bf asked if my blog's updated.
obviously not.

so now i am updating via my hp because i cant seem to get connected to the net via my laptop. bah.

tomorrow, ok.
tomorrow i'll try to log in from my laptop again and give a proper update.

=)

random

2010-02-13T12:14:00.001+08:00

some random stuff i found while i was blog/tumblr hopping which i found meaningful & true. =)

meaningful

2010-02-12T00:18:00.002+08:00

just because she comes off strong doesnt mean she didnt fall asleep crying.
even though she acts like nothing is wrong, maybe she's just real good at lying.

bahh.

2010-02-10T09:54:00.005+08:00

blogging on a weekday.
it could only mean one thing: i am at home.
home on a weekday.
it could only mean two things: i am not at work & i am sick.

bah.

my last update was last month. =)
sorry la. i've been very busy with work.
so i promise thisentry is going to be one long-ass entry!

lemme see.

2 weekends ago, i went KL with my family.
the only difference this time was that we didnt stay over at our relatives' place. instead we rented a service apartment in KL itself and it was the shite i tell you. and apparently its so effing cheap la, considering the location, size, etc.

i didnt take much picture of the apartment itself though. forgot. =\
so just make do with whatever picture i have which was taken at the very last minute before checking out. =P

pardon the messed up place. it was because the chambermaid was not in yet to make the bed, clear the apartment and stuff. =P

and this was also the time i got together with a few of my cousins whom i've not seen in years! didnt snap much photos though, except for one. =)

this is sufi, my 21 yr old cousin whom i last saw was during cik lia's engagement like 5yrs ago or so. =)

i had to miss the team's bbq chill out session due to the trip and i am very jealous because as seen on the pictures, they had loads of fun! i also want! =(

last weekend was also spent in KL but this time with the company.

my headache's back.
so i think i will just do updates on the KL trip with the company & of something unexpected that happened maybe later, ya!

toodles!

how like that?

2010-01-20T21:19:00.003+08:00

i think i talk too much.
i think i think too much.

i want to go karaoke & eat at arnold's.
i want to play pool, i want to go bowling.
i want to have ice cream picnic, again.

how like that?

coughcough.sniffsniff.

2010-01-18T15:54:00.004+08:00

oooo. its a monday and i am blogging.
cool kan!

ok la.
basically i went to the office in the morning. went through the meetings and stuff.
yes, i was sick.
and i had the mother of all cramps i tell you.

even rena was asking me if i was ok.
because apparently, i looked pale. -_-
see, i hate it when i fall sick because it is so damn obvious! =(

the actual reason to why i was forcing myself to go to the office today was because of my trainee. haha.
but ended up she also didnt come because she is running a fever. haha.

so seeing my targets are up, i thought maybe i would start la.
start early, then towards the end of the week, whatever signups i get would be bonus for me, right?

but changed my mind because i vomitted whatever liquid i had in my tummy. haha.
ewww. gross.

so went to ica with sandra & edward to do my passport for the upcoming rally in kl this february.
have i ever mentioned how much i hate taking passport/ic photos? uurgghh!
collection will be this friday. yay!

saw zaihar along the way and apparently sandra knows him.
so dengan slamber nye, aku pun tanya, "you were from pasir ris npc for your ns, right?" and he was kinda shocked.
haha. i sound like a damn stalker la.
so i just said that, "ouh. i am fadzli's... ex.." which really stabbed me through the heart la because i nearly introduced myself as "fadzli's gf" which obviously i am not anymore la dengz!

so he wants to meet today. & today is the 18th. why today pun i dont know. out of all dates. not as if he remember the significance of the date anyway.
apparently he wants to clear his name. clear what name pun i dont know.
because according to him, i do not know the whole story about him & the girl. i only know part of it. whatever.

so, apparently the girl has been his friend. & there is only one girl whom i know who has been his friend. & this is also the same girl i PMed on FB once upon a time dulu who told me to work things out with fadzli & that it is a waste if our rship were to be over just like that.
so which mean, it is possible that he already had feelings for her even when he was with me, right? & the only obstacle he had for expressing his feelings for her at that point of time was because he was still attached to me. because you see, he has this "status" he has to uphold, ie. not being a timer.

but still, i felt like i've been cheated on.
because seriously,
its all too sudden, isnt it?
its barely a month since the break up.
& this is the same guy who apparently were so devastated over the break up, crying & such, telling me that if i ever leave him, there will be no other for him & that he will turn gay. -_-

omgwtfh.
i am so pissed la because all those years i believed when he said he is not a stmf, he turned out to be one. really.
so now all i want to do is to meet him, let him clear his name & get it over & done with.
because i have had enough of this shit.
& like how i've shared my short/mid/long term goal, that is not to fall in love with assholes anymore.

g.r.a.s.p

2010-01-17T11:50:00.006+08:00

wasnt working yesterday because i was down with a fever.
crap sia! wake up in the morning with such a bad migraine so had to message sandra and rena to inform them of my absence from office.
then, i realised that rena wont be in the office either so i should be messaging daniel instead. but by then, i was feeling too tired and sick to do that.
bah.

lesley woke me up from my slumber to ask if i was joining them for the vici team outing.
which i totally forgot about. omg. =(

feeling tad better, i did.
wrong move because after my nap, i felt my fever coming back. -_-"

reached cineleisure a lil late. sorry zaman!

the blind side was a very good movie.
i know i am sucha sucker for movies which are based on true stories.
but seriously, its a movie worth watching.
so many valuable lessons taught in the movie itself. just prep yourself tissues when watching it.
its the kind of movie i dont mind watching over and over again.

hang out for awhile outside cineleisure. snapping photos while some were busy inhaling nicotine into their lungs. haha!

dinner/supper was at bbq chicken after that with the team.
service super slow can!

there were talks of going karaoke after that.
but plans were changed afterwards due to lack of response. haha!
so shared a cab with mel & nezar. initial plan was to drop them off first but then we decided to drop by jalan kayu. =P

so through cups of tehs, we had conversations flowing.
about how long it took me to wake up & get out of a rship of 3yrs.
about how much i gave in just because i wanted to hang on to the rship & not fight for 3yrs.

truth be told,
no, i am not over the rship.
i cant possibly just forget about that 3yrs, even though it was not all rainbows & butterflies.
even so, i spent 3yrs of my life with someone whom i thought i will be spending the rest of my life with.
& i would be lying if i said, "no, i dont love fadzli anymore" because i still love and care for him.

so when i found out that he is now in love with somebody else, it hurts real bad.
true, i was the one who asked for the breaking up and i shouldnt be the one who is feeling like shit now that i found out he has moved on.
but i just cant believe that this is the same guy who told me that if i ever leave him, he will never love another again.
and now, barely a month after the break up, he is now in love with someone else.
plus he has already confessed to her of his feelings.

no,
i do not have hopes of us being back together again.
the feeling is just.... sucky, you know.
i want to know his secret of being able to move on so fast, to just forget about the 3yrs within less than a month.
& this situation also got me thinking why in the world he kept asking if there are new guys in my life or if there are guys who wants to get to know me. i reckon its because of this la.

ouh bummer.

so i am like telling averyone that i want to stay single for a year, at least.
that's the plan.
but if god has other plans for me, then we shall see.

reached home close to 2am. haha.
then flat on my bed, with contacts & all.
still can wake up this morning wondering how come everything seemed so clear. -_-

i am going to wash my clothes. bye!

update!

2010-01-10T16:35:00.005+08:00

will be doing my blog linkings soon!
i promise.

i think now, the only time i can actually blog is during the weekend. because on weekdays, after work, most of the time i will just go flat. haha. no energy to even log into facebook sometimes. not even twitter. the only time i would tweet is via sgbeat. but then, i cant read any replies. bah.

not that i am complaining. haha. love my job.
its just that i need to focus more this coming week in order to see the results coming in. the last week i couldnt focus because i was super sick and too many things were running a marathon in my head.

and before i forget,
i want to congratulate 2 people with whom i attended the induction training for getting their respective stage 1 & stage 2 promotion, syaiful & zurah! congratulations ya!

with fun we shine!

2010-01-03T21:20:00.008+08:00

you know what?
between the both of us, we have a couple of common friends.

of course what fadzli has to say about you dont matter to me anymore.
because in the first place, even when fadzli & myself were together, he would be very defensive when i have negative things to say about you.
i seriously dont understand why i have no right to be jealous then about a girl who is obviously, to which many of my friends agree to, "flirting" with him.

but what my new friend has to say about you is what really interest me.
i suggest that instead of acting like teenage girls who goes googoo-gaga for guys with bikes,
maybe you should be acting your age.
& you should be acting like a mother should.
you do have a son, remember?

ouh,
and i also found out you wanted to add my friend's ex (at that time they were together, of course) but my friend rejected your request because you have ZERO friend in common.

just a suggestion.
stop adding random guys on FB just because their profile pic shows them with their bikes.
are you trying to build a reputation of yourself being "easy" for guys with bikes?

as per your comment on tagboard & my reply to it;
go ahead la with fadzli since you want him so much.
maybe then you will stop acting like what you work.

seriously, i am not mad at you anymore.
but you know what?
i just feel sorry for you.

***************

on a different & positive note altogether.

i just got promoted yesterday. =)

with my trainer, sandra. =)

technically, it is my 2nd week. haha!

because my first week of work, i basically only worked for 3days due to the 2days of training.
& for the second week, it was only 3days of work due to the xmas break. =P

though my initial goal was to get promoted to stage2 before 2009 ended, but due to those circumstances, that did not happen. but i am still happy because i got promoted on the 2nd day of 2010. a great way to start the new year, isnt it?

next goal:
team manager by may 2010. ;)

so now,
who wants to join my team? =P

inarah!

2010-01-01T21:06:00.006+08:00

so how am i feeling today?
i feel good, i feel great. i feel juiiiicccyyy!!!

=p

anyways,
first up:
happy new year ya!
2009 has been a bittersweet journey for me. many things had happened. both good and bad. mistakes and choices. many many things.

let me recap on what happened in 2009, ya.

january
- amni started her sec 1 in my alma mater - anderson secondary school. now its almost complete. my brother & i were andersonians. my younger sister is now an andersonian. except for my elder sister.
- something happened on the 24th january: fadzli & i broke up for the first time in 2009.

february
- my brother turned 33.
- fadzli & i decided to give our rship another try, another chance. he started changing for the better. alhamdullilah.
- i got retrenched for the first time ever.

farewell dinner cum john's birthday @ sakura international buffet orchard.

march
- asyrani turned 5.

- fadzli got into a major accident in pasir gudang.

which got me worried sick like eff. spent my days accompanying him in the hospital, checkups & at his house.
- this was the month fadzli stopped his positive change due to the accident. =(

april
- zahirul turned 1.

- broke up for the 2nd time in 2009.
- stopped blogging on highonlollies.

may
- amni turned 13.
- remained friends with fadzli. just friends.

june
- my mom turned 55.
- k. ayu turned 32.
- rship was on the path to recovery.

july
- fadzli turned 30.
- celebrated his birthday with him. =) handmade something special for him because i know how much he loves my handmade gifts for him. or at least, that's what i thought. =)
- gave the rship another try.

august
- cant rmbr.

september
- cant rmbr.

october
- we turned 36.
- syukriah turned 4. (pictures are with abang.)
- spent our anniversary in the most romantic environment ever even though we fought the night before.

little did we know that it would also be the last time we will be celebrating our anniversary.

november
- ayah turned 63.
- i turned 25.
- kakak turned 32.
- spent my birthday with a simple meal at simpang. that's it. this year was also the first time ever he did nothing special for my birthday. i was pretty sad actually but i just decided to brush it off by being thankful that he actually celebrated the first few minutes of 10th november with me.

december
- we broke up on the 13th officially.
- i started my new job on the 14th officially.

yes. that was how i looked like a day after my breakup. makeup & all those lessons during speech & drama was really useful. ;)

busied myself with my work in order not to think too much about the situation. thank god for blessing me with the job at the right timing.

team chillout @ tcc clarke quay.

chillout session with the new execs & rena @ pitstop.

lucky draw. in which i won one of the consolation prizes of 50bucks.

charities leaders' meeting @ pan pacific orchard.

company xmas party @ dxo.

countdown in the office. =)

- went back into contact with my friends whom i had to "forgo" for the sake of the rship.
i guess that pretty much sum up my 2009. =)

i am looking forward to 2010. ever ready to embrace it with open arms and mind.
what about you?

why?

2009-12-28T01:47:00.006+08:00

because i deserve to be happy.

for 3yrs plus,
i had to give in:
no close friends.
no guy friends.
no meetup with friends.

and now,
i can have all of the above.
& i thank my friends whom i had to "leave" for the past 3yrs for still being there for me despite it all.

i love you guys. =)

& so far, i've had 2 impromtu & random meetups with my friends.
=)

& many more to come. =)

my secret recipe.

2009-12-25T10:44:00.004+08:00

due to the xmas party on the 23rd, my company's closed till xmas. haha.
& my brother successfully managed to persuade my parents to keluar with my mom having to miss her cruel intentions on channel u. haha.

so decided to go to changi airport.
initial plan was to go for dinner at popeye's & then walk around t3 to snap some photos.

so while waiting for my dad to siap, i snapped some photos of my handsome cheeky boy. =)

so a long drive in the car to the airport.

but to our dismay, popeye's was packed. =(

so we took a walk further down to secret recipe. a full meal, complete with dessert. seriously full la, ok.

but ayah had a tummyache after dinner so we had to cancel plans of walking around t3 for some photos. haha.
so ended up popeye's was for supper which we tapao-ed back home. heh.

abg bought new game for his xbox360. so he was like asking us to stay over because he got not geng to play the game. haha.
and we became his entertainment by our silly antics playing his game. haha.

ok la. blogger photo uploader is being sucha bitch. anyways, photos can be found on my facebook so go drop by, ok. =P

ho.ho.ho.

2009-12-24T10:14:00.001+08:00

had my 1st ever experience for a christmas party. & it was last night! yay!

so the theme was "movie" & it was held over at dxo.
my costume was kinda last minute because i didnt exactly want to spend money on a costume which i will only wear once.
there were quite a few ideas for me.
but it was during the charities leaders meeting held over at pan pacific the very morning of the party, i actually finalised my costume. haha!

there were some photos taken during the leaders' meeting but its not in my camera. so ash, zura & alex, may i the photos please? =)

anyway, i finalised my character & decided to go as....

professor minerva mcgonagall

ok la. cheat.
i didnt exactly go as her because everybody thought i was the fairy godmother for shrek.
haha.
anything goes la.
at least the character's from a movie.

wont be posting up much photos here though.
photos will be on my facebook.
so go see, ok?

stayed on for awhile for the afterparty. haha. an afterparty after the party. ok. i am lame.
looking forward to more, ya!
especially to malacca/KL with the whole bunch in feb! =D

announcement.

2009-12-17T23:33:00.008+08:00

this is an official announcement.

fadzli & i have broken up, officially on the 13th of december 2009. we had our differences & some things happened. what exactly, i dont think it would be nice for me to actually share in on this platform. =)

just got back from a team dinner with the whole bunch. =)

2 of my bosses shared something with us a few days ago, "for our dreams to work, we have to work for our dreams" & "our life should be like a river; always moving forward; & not like a reservoir."

i really thank god for actually fulfilling my prayers, as well as the prayers of my loved ones.
& i look at my break up with fadzli as a blessing in disguise.

yes, i was devastated by the break up.
yes, i was sad.
yes, i was hurt.
i would be lying if i say that i am not feeling any of the above.

& yes, irregardless of whatever that has happened, i still have feelings for him.
hey, i spent years with him. unlike him, it wont be easy for me to let my feeling go just like that.
especially when factually, i am an emotional person.
however, i know, eventually, one day, i will be able to say, "no. fadzli may have a place in my heart but i do not have feelings for him anymore."

that is why i thank god that i got this job at the very right timing.
being busy actually helped in pushing away the thoughts of him & our failed rship.

when i went for my first interview, fadzli & i were in the midst of arguing. somehow something useful fadzli taught me was what i put into practice; not to let my emotions take control over me.
& when i went for my 2nd interview/training, we were still in the midst of argument. & again, i practised what he told me.
i got accepted eventually & i went for the training cum induction on the 14th dec 2009.
on the 13th dec 2009, we officially broke up.

why did i say my breakup with fadzli was a blessing in disguise?
because if i were to still be with fadzli, i will not be able to accept this job. fadzli wanted me to have a deskbound job, office hours.
this job may be a 5.5 working day but its not a deskbound job. i get to go out to meet & interact with people.
something which i enjoy doing.
something which fadzli wont like me doing.

so i took the breakup as a blessing in disguise.
my new colleagues dont even know that i had broken up.
funny right when i went for my 1st training, i was attached.
but when i start working, i am no longer attached.
i didnt show any form of negative emotions at work.

& today when i get back from work, checked my FB,
i found out that fadzli had his rship status removed.
he has moved on. congratulations! =)

will we still continue being friends?
no, we wont.
in fact, its something fadzli told me from the beginning - he wouldnt want to continue being friends with me should we break up.
moreover, he already have a group of his friends. they are the ones who he loves cares about the most. they are the VIPs in his life. he doesnt need me in his life.

& with that, thank you fadzli.
for teaching me something very important & useful.
i really do hope that you are happier now.

& thank you my friends who has given me the words of encouragement after my break up with him. you know who you are!

for now, i want to work & make sure all my dreams which were not achievable due to him to work for me now. slowly but surely, one by one, my dreams will come true.
& i want to make sure my life will be flowing like a river - forward. not thinking back about what happened in the past. just looking & moving forward.

gdnite!

xoxo.

confession.

2009-12-16T00:20:00.003+08:00

the truth hurts.
but what hurts the most is that the 3yrs++ were based on lies & sweet words from you.

thank you. very much.

2 days ago was the 14th.
2 more days would be the 18th.
i doubt you would remember.
& even if you did, you wont care.

because we live in a smart smart world.

2009-12-13T20:13:00.015+08:00

what's your phone?
my phone's like real pathetic. haha. those you buy at cheers/7-eleven. bought by my ex for me because my phone before that was seriously condemned. lol.
the phone's good enough for calling & messaging; the basics.
but i NEED more in a phone besides the basics.

i need the camera, for taking photos of interesting sightings (& blog about it, of course!) & of course, of myself. =P
i need the mp3 player, for those long or even short bus/mrt rides, especially those days i forgot to charge my mp3 player.
i need the wi-fi, for being connected anywhere without having to bring my laptop around. & also so i can tweet & FB on the go! =D
& considering how *cough*busy*cough* i am now, i need to check my emails on the go too!
i need bluetooth, for transferring of photos from my friends' phone to mine (vice versa) & from my laptop to my phone (vice versa).
i need the navigator too! its a NEED. considering how i can get lost in singapore. yes. i do get lost in our island. =(

so when nuffnang actually sent me an email, i went to the website & read through. & i was like, "cool or whattttt!!!" because its like nuffnang is giving me a chance to have my prayers answered!

lo & behold!

nüvifone G60 - connect. communicate. navigate.

like omg. its everything i need in A phone la!
let's shout with me, "it's a prayer come true!"

nüvifone G60 is operating on linux.

Linux is predominantly known for its use in servers, although can be installed on a wide variety of computer hardware, ranging from embedded devices, mobile phones and even some watches to mainframes and supercomputers.Linux distributions, installed on both desktop and laptop computers, have become increasingly commonplace in recent years, partly owing to the popular Ubuntu distribution and the emergence of netbooks.
~ source: wikipedia

& to emphasize how lightweight the phone is,

see what i mean?
nüvifone G60 only weighs 137g, with batteries that has 250hours of standby time.

the navigator works on voice prompting & there is a safety feature of "where am i?" which will feature the nearest police station, hospital & fuel services with just one click! & if you drive, the phone actually comes with a car mount. & if you dont drive, like me, the navigator actually comes with in-hand navigation, especially for pedestrian.

& you know how it is inconvenient to be bringing the earpiece of your handphone around. now you dont have to worry la. because with nüvifone G60, you can use your normal 2.5mm earphones. you know those normal earphones you use on your mp3 players? so in case your earpiece gets spoilt (which happens to me every single time), you dont have to worry about finding a new one asap because you can just use your normal earpiece! =D

& just in case you are a camwhore like me (i know. not shy.),

despite it having just 3mp camera, which i personally think it is fine enough (have i told you that the camera comes with geo tagging?!) & who actually relies alot on her hp for mp3s (like me!), you dont have to worry about limited space. because this awesome phone comes with 4gb memory. & if that is not enough, it supports micro sd up to 16gb. like, woahhhhh.

& if you are always on the go, check this out.

this sleek phone does this phone allow you to surf the internet (as "shown" in the picture above.) actually supports word, excel, powerpoint & pdf for its document viewing. just in case you are on the way to a meeting or maybe a presentation & its like super important, you can actually look through your presentation & your speech through this baby. & if you are still schooling, you can do the same! i wish i had this kind of phone when i was still schooling. damn!

pardon the quality. this picture was taken with my webcam.
SEE WHAT I MEAN BY NEEDING A PHONE WITH A CAMERA?

anyway,
i love you, nuffnang!
thank you for giving us bloggers this chance to win this awesomenistic phone!

i could go on and on about how awesome this phone is based on what i read on the website. but seriously, you be your own judge. visit https://store.garminasus.com/store/catalog/productInfo.jsf?productId=37073 for more info on garmin-asus nüvifone G60!

*photos of nüvifone G60 credit: here

quote

2009-12-12T15:18:00.001+08:00

"relationships are like glass. sometimes it's better to leave them broken than try to hurt yourself putting it back together."
~ author unknown

how to fight fair.

2009-12-09T22:43:00.002+08:00

ouh god. i realise i've been blogging a whole lot these days.
i read a couple of dr. phil's articles.

seriously, who does not know dr. phil mcgraw?

so this article i read by dr. phil is on how to fight fair. thought i'd share it with you.
oooooooo.
while i was reading this article, i was actually listening to class95's love song. & those who listen to this show will know yasminne have different topics she talks about every night. so coincidentally, she was actually discussing on the same topic i was reading, on how to fight fair.
andandand, get this.
she was actually discussing on dr. phil's article too.
because seriously, if you were to google on this topic, you have like so many different articles but we were actually doing on the exact same article.
cool or whatt.

anyways, back to topic.

arguments are inevitable in rships. i think everybody knows that. no matter how you try not to argue, sooner or later arguments are bound to happen. & it is said that arguments actually keeps a rship healthy. because by arguing, you correct things that are wrong.

but how do you argue? & why do you argue?
do you argue with the intention of hurting the other party?
do you argue with the intention of wanting to be in control of the rship?
do you argue with the intention of wanting to correct things that are wrong?

i think in general, people would say that they argue because they want to correct things that are wrong. but if that is true, do you take time to listen to the other party? or do you actually argue by asking the other party to shut up & just listen to you?
if its the latter, you're just hurting the other party & being a control freak.

anyways,
here is 7 pointers to fighting fair in the rship.

1. Take it private and keep it private.
Fighting in front of your children is nothing short of child abuse. It can and will scar them emotionally — all because you don't have the self-control to contain yourself until you can talk privately.

- emotional abuse is the worst form of abuse, in my personal point of view, not only to children but adults alike. physical abuse may leave a scar, true. but that scar may be gone in time to come. but emotional abuse leaves a scar that can never be removed. it is the most damaging abuse that can ever be done to a person. if you really love a person, never abuse him/her emotionally. he/she can cry but seriously, once you start abusing someone emotionally, how much exactly can you do to make things right? you're pissed, why dont you just have a take-5. cool down before talking to your partner. isolate yourself from your partner. let the kids sleep before discussing, with no shouting involved.

2. Keep it relevant.
Don't bring up old grudges or sore points when they don't belong in a particular argument. Put boundaries around the subject matter so that a fight doesn't deteriorate into a free-for-all.

- i think the only reason how this could happen is because there is no "closure" in the topic. ensure that you have closed the topic proper. talk about a topic till it is "closed" proper. it is really no use if to one party, the topic has been closed but to the other, it has not. thats a win-lose situation. talk until both parties reached a mutual understanding that the topic has been settled.

3. Avoid character assassination.
Stay focused on the issue, rather than deteriorating to the point of attacking your partner personally. Don't let the fight degenerate into name-calling.

- name calling is very hurtful, especially the person whom you love do it. being mad at the other party does not give you an excuse to start your name callings & cursing, especially when the other party does not "join" you in the name callings. but seriously, a normal human being would retaliate with name calling too. if he/she does not "join" you in the name callings, DO NOT continue. because not only do you hurt him/her with your name calling, you will get hurt too when she/he retaliates. & when you get hurt when she/he start calling you names, think about how you hurt him/her with your name callings too.

4. Remain task-oriented.
Know what you want going into the disagreement. If you don't have a goal in mind, you won't know when you've achieved it.

- find the root of the problem. work around it. talk about it. arguments happen due to miscommunication most of the time. so communicate. TALK & not scream/shout to your partner. LISTEN & not hear what your partner is trying to get across. if you think you cant do all that when you're pissed, take a break. wait till you cool down!

5. Allow for your partner to retreat with dignity.
How an argument ends is crucial. Recognize when an olive branch is being extended to you — perhaps in the form of an apology or a joke — and give your partner a face-saving way out of the disagreement.

- rship is not about competition, its about partnership. whats the use if in the end of the argument your partner admits defeat. so does that mean you win in the argument? ok, maybe you won in the argument but you lose in the rship. because if you insist that your partner is 100% wrong in the argument, the bad feelings will surface eventually. you rship will be strained. in an argument, no one person is 100% wrong. it takes 2 hands to clap. that phrase does not only applies in your rship but also in arguments. if your partner apologises, accept it. do not respond to the apology by telling him/her that he/she is the cause of the argument 100%. you too, in one way or another, play a part in the cause of the argument.

6. Be proportional in your intensity.
Every single thing you disagree about is not an earth-shattering event or issue. You do not have to get mad every time you have a right to be.

- true. express your unhappiness, without getting angry. but if it is done repeatedly even after numerous times you voiced out your unhappiness, then it just shows your partner is taking your patience for granted. everybody's patience has its limits. once that limit is crossed, you will snap. if he/she is still doing all that even after you snapped, then he/she must either be blind or just plain stupid.

7. There's a time limit.
Arguments should be temporary, so don't let them get out of hand. Don't allow the ugliness of an argument to stretch on indefinitely.

- get it over & done with. talk about it. do i really need to explain this point?

* article (in bold & italic): here

no topic.

2009-12-08T01:37:00.012+08:00

i am supposed to be sleeping right now.
because i've to wake up early later to go to chinatown.
but there's too many things going through my mind.
i dont even know where to start thinking.

sometimes we tend to wear a mask for so long, we dont even know ourselves anymore.
& those people who gets to know you do not exactly get to know you but rather get to know the mask.
catch my drift?
everybody's so hypocritical in this world.
seriously, have you ever found somebody who really is very blunt, speaks his/her mind without a care in the world, etc. you know all those traits of being a non-hypocrite?
i do not know of such people.
everybody i know is a hypocrite, one way or another, i think.
because seriously, how far are you able to be blunt/frank/straightforward to the people around you?

true, to your friends you may be blunt.
true, to your family members you may speak your mind.
but seriously, when you work, are you really as straightforward as you claim to be? ok, maybe your superior may say that he/she would very much appreciate it if you are open about yourself.
but seriously, how "open" could you get with your superior.
boot licking, apple polishing.
i think it is something really important in order for you to survive the working world.
i didnt bother to do any boot licking and apple polishing for the first 2 fulltime job i held. i didnt last long there.
i tried doing it for the 3rd job, & i failed terribly because its just not me.
maybe i should consider learning how to lick boots & polish apples.
*shrugs*

BUT funnily enough,
i do not know how to speak my mind when it comes to people close to my heart. i dont know why.
i tend to bottle it all up & breakdown.
not the kind of go crazy kinda breakdown but the kind of locking myself in my room & cover my face with my pillow to muffle the sounds of my screaming & crying.
call me a crybaby but seriously, crying really help. for me at least. so does shouting/screaming.
it feels like, when i scream & shout & cry, i let it all out.
like a burden is off my shoulder.
weird? maybe.

its already 2am & i seriously need to sleep.
toodles.

xoxo.

cheating.

2009-12-06T14:08:00.010+08:00

sometimes i wonder what makes a partner cheat?
what counts as cheating?

i was reading an article on glamour.com & that was how i decided to blog on this topic. click on the picture.

take note there's 5pages for this article. be sure to read all of the pages. but if you are like my bf, who dont like reading this sorta things (except when it is about bikes. bahh.), then dont. maybe next time if i have an interesting article on bikes, i'll share it here.
but it would be like one in a thousand chance i am ever going to do that. haha.

anyhoos, enough of digression.

there are different scenarios in the article that points to cheating. sometimes, even something you thought is innocent enough could be considered as cheating.
& to each his/her own. what may be considered as cheating to one may not be considered as cheating to another. a very broad subject to be discussed on.

in my point of view,
if you want to cheat, dont.
but if you are too itchy backside, do it discreetly & make sure you do not hurt your partner.
but in singapore, its kinda difficult. it being a small country & all.
you partner will bound to find out.

i ever told fadzli,
if one day should he thinks he wants to cheat on me, just make sure its with another woman.
it will hurt, of course.
but i would be doubly hurt if he cheats on me with another man. haha.
not encouraging him to cheat on me, of course. but just in case. haha.

if the reason for you to cheat is based on your unhappiness with your partner,
the best thing to do is to talk to him/her. wouldnt it be better to talk about what you're unsatisfied about in your rship rather than cheat? wouldnt that be a win-win situation where your partner will know what about him/her that irks you?

& if you decide to cheat on your partner because you do not love him/her anymore, rather than cheat, might as well break up, right? what's the use of you being in a rship with someone you do not love? you would want to be in a rship because you love that person & you would like your future to have that person in it, right? being with someone you dont love is defeating the whole rship thing.

& it is much more horrible when the person you are cheating with knows that you are attached. yet, he/she agrees into being the 'other person'. wth!

so, have i cheated? yes.
have i been cheated on? yes.
& i know the feeling suck. big time.
but nope, the 'yes' to both questions above was in a rship not with fadzli. =)

but if you do cheat/get cheated on,
just remember that what goes around, comes around.
& that karma's a big time bitch when it bites you hard in the ass. =)

*disclaimer: no, fadzli's not cheating on me. & no, i am not cheating on fadzli.

more of the x's.

2009-12-05T12:42:00.003+08:00

kisses.
something magical if its done out of love.

my first kiss was from my mother, i think. haha.
either her or my dad.
when i was a baby.
the first kiss of love i experienced. =)

but of course,
if we are talking about the first kiss i had with someone of the opposite sex who is not a family member, obviously it was with my first ever boyfriend then.
i was 16. he was 20, i think. -_-
i started dating late, i know.

it was a horrible kiss i remembered. very bad first experience.
his lips were dry and he had a smelly breath.
ewww.
thinking about it now makes me wanna puke, you know.
but at that time, i was curious and i wanted to know.
it didnt help he had those stubbles. i guess he thinks its cool to not clean shave his moustache. urrgh.
i had expected my first kiss to be like those in the movies, you know.
like fireworks, birds chirping & those kind of feelings.
but now, it didnt happen that way.
i thought it would at least be like the picture below.

photo credit: here.

but nope, it wasnt. =(

so no.
my first kiss wasnt something worth to remember but somehow i cant forget about it. haha. maybe because its the first, you know. =)

& you know those cartoons about kissing the frog & it will turn into prince charming.
i've had my fair share of kissing frogs but they didnt turn into prince charming (& none of the kisses turn out to be like in the photo either). bahhh.
this current one? 3yrs plus with him, he can still work towards the prince charming part. haha. =P

dont expect the frogs you've kissed to automatically turn into your prince charming. it takes time.
they may not be your prince charming today but who knows about tomorrow. right? =)

how about a fairytale with a twist?
catch The Princess and the Frog in cinemas 10th december 2009.

xoxo.

eff.

2009-12-04T09:52:00.004+08:00

this is official.

this week is the most eff-ed up week ever.
just not my week.

left. right. front. back. up. down. center.

screw it la. seriously.
the whole week i've been nothing but irritated.
& sick.

does anybody care? NO.
NOBODY gives a damn.

& the best part is,
i think i've been swallowing too many panadols & my right side's screwed up again. same feeling like how it was in november 2008.
& my temperature decides its funny to increase & decrease sukahatimakbapak dia.
my cough's getting drier by the day, as dry as the sahara.
& my nose is running like its for the standard chartered 10k marathon.
& sneezing is the cherry on top; non-stop hits.

eff this week la!

running thoughts

2009-12-01T10:46:00.008+08:00

i think the position of my bed in my room is wrong.
i hate the fact that the sun shines directly onto the "head" of my bed. so if i am lying down, the sun shines directly onto my face.

or maybe i should just change the curtains coz currently, i am using the "rambubaramburamba" curtains.
but come to think of it, it wont make much of a difference because i do not have night curtains for my room, just day curtains. so if i use the day curtains, sunlight can still shine through.

& i like the position of my bed now, actually. except for the fact stated above.

maybe i should consider wearing those eyemask to sleep. so maybe it will help me stop being irritated by the sun.

i am supposed to think of where to go.
because after the bf's done tuning his bike, he's picking me up & we are going dating.
hate it when i cant think of anywhere to go.
singapore's so small! & interesting things to do will require moolahs. & it doesnt help that the weather's unpredictable these days. worst, my nose's acting like a tap & my head's doing some headspin.

btw, to enter universal studios singapore in sentosa, it will cost 68bucks, if i am not wrong, for adults.
omg!

i feel like bringing the camera out to snap photos. but even if i were to put the camera in the box, it still wont exactly protect the camera from heavy rain, right? i dont know. =(

i am out of ideas of where to go. seriously.
macam nak amik passport & go JB je senang. but go JB do what?
the bf dont really like leaving his bike alone because a couple of his friends & people he knows had their bikes either stolen or "projected" on.

bummer.

suntec/bugis/marina square is definitely out of the question for him. he hates those places. dont ask me why.

vivocity? kallang leisure park? town?
do what sey go those places.

macam nak just go to the beach & bum around.
but again, the weather is an issue.

susah2 ajak pergi library aje. i can read my books/magazines. he can go look for his motor2 magazines/books.
but whats the purpose of that kind of date sey.

i love dates with my bf.
but the part i hate most, besides the goodbyes, is when i have to think of places to go for our date.
headache!

&&& i cant believe i am actually googling on places to go/things to do in singapore for my date with my bf.
omg!

the reason is you.

2009-11-29T11:04:00.004+08:00

the bf's not happy with the photos of him taken in SIC.
when he showed me the photos, yeah, i agree that his photos taken in PG were much nicer than those taken in SIC.

but it doesnt matter, baby.
there's always a next time, kan.
january, right? =)

yesterday was spent at his friend's solemnization. initial plan was to go over to his friend's place at bukit panjang but since it was raining heavily, we decided to make a move straight to the girl's place over at woodlands. moreover from serangoon to woodlands is nearer than serangoon to bukit panjang. butt pain la sit so long on the bike. especially if its his baby yamaha, not the father yamaha, he rides on singapore road. haha.

spent a few hours after the solemnization with his friends. & so pitiful ok. the food served was ikan asam pedas (i dont eat fish), gulai nangka (i dont eat nangka) & sambal sotong kering (i dont eat sotong kering). so in the end, i just ate the sambal tumis & ulam. haha. i became vegetarian at a jemputan. =P

made a move from the ceremony & we went to YD. wah. so long never go YD. played a stupid game of throwing rocks into the waters. then fadzli threw one of the rocks senget & it landed near the group of people. haha. panic sekejap. haha. then we made our own stupid plans of escaping should it hit people. lameass la both of us. =P

had our ice cream roti & then off to serangoon where we, or rather i, ate because i was hungry! i didnt eat proper ok during the ceremony. had horfun. new halal seafood place la in serangoon. ok, maybe not new place but new management.

ok. now i feel like cooking horfun. there's no seafood or beef at home, only mutton. maybe i will cook mutton horfun. maybe i will send some to fadzli over at work. haha. kesian. sunday pun kerja. =P

i love you baby.
even with your cacat fingers & a missing front tooth. =)

a quarter of a century.

2009-11-17T23:33:00.002+08:00

didnt really have a celebration on the day itself. haha. wasnt actually looking forward to my birthday as how i used to. i guess age has finally caught up on me. fadzli would be very glad to hear that. =P

fadzli was on night shift on my birthday, ie. 10th november, so any hopes of celebrating my birthday with him were dashed. plus he was not allowed to take any leave due to an important event. so we met instead on the 9th november. so after work, walked over to his workplace for a short dropby. talked for a few minutes & off i went on the shuttle service to white sands shopping centre to wait for him. where else but the library. haha.

so once he was done with his shift at approximately 8.30pm, he picked me up & off we zoomed to simpang.

yes azira, you saw us! =)

not an elaborated affair. just a simple dinner/supper over at simpang. it dont really feel like its my birthday though. haha. not that i am complaining.
ouh ya.
hugeass teh halia. never again sey!

but of course, we spent the first few minutes of my birthday together.

& that was it.
simple, nice & meaningful. for me, at least. =)

& on the day itself,
received a few birthday wishes on FB. thank you!
& of course from my family.

mom made me a bookmark.
& my nephew+niece gave me a sticker.
cute kan.
haha.

nothing much la happen on my birthday.

but the main highlight would be,
i am now offically a 25 year old, a quarter of a century old. =)

november 8th, 2009 (part three)

2009-11-16T11:14:00.003+08:00

even though fadzli & myself had been on singapore flyer before, this time it felt a lil bit different because we had amirul & amirah with us. moreover, the last time we went on the sg flyer, it was in the evening so basically we got to see the "transition" of the time.

i guess that was why it slipped our minds to visit the yakult garden.
so this time with the kids, we decided to give the yakult garden a visit. =)

nothing really great about the yakult garden, in my personal point of view. just watching kois & tortoises bore me. haha.

& then it was time for the last part of the outing. i think it was somethng the kids really looked forward too. so off we zoomed to east coast after a boring 15mins in the yakult garden. heh.

armed with drinks, their caps, their towels and their skate scooters, we went over to one of the many parks in east coast park. haha. i think that sentence sounded kinda redundant, dont you think so?

anyways,
i do not know whats the name of the park but all i know was, when we reached there, the place was literally empty. but when we left, it was crowded. -_-

amirul rossi
he FBs everywhere, i tell you. EVERYWHERE.
muka penat amirul. hehe.
so with the kids tired & sweaty, we decided to call it a day.
drove to pasir ris to drop off the kids first, hang around for awhile before fadzli sending me home.

overall?
a well day spent. should be la. because even fadzli said so.
has to be. because he had to forgo his trackday in PG. =P

november 8th, 2009 (part two)

2009-11-15T23:25:00.012+08:00

lunch was at kallang mcdees. happy meals, mega mac, mega mcspicy, mcwings. yummish. =D

from kallang mcdees, we drove along nicoll highway,

passed by some fluffy clouds,

saw more fluffy clouds,

saw the singapore flyer on the left,

drove by marina square,

saw the singapore flyer again.
& at last, we reached out pitstop.
cheh.
feeling2 the amazing race arh konon.

kanak-kanak riang da sampai pitstop.
especially the one at the back. haha.
singapore flyer.

walked across the bridge,

went through the check in counter,

& more camwhoring happened. =)
this was when we decided to dilly-dally, with hopes that we will get one whole capsule just for the four of us. so we snapped photo after photo just to "pass time". haha.

& of course, we succeeded! yay!

one whole capsule for the four of us, bebeh!
so apa lagi. buat macam rumah sendiri la the kids.

more camwhoring happened in the capsule, of course.
fadzli was holding on to my d50 while i was busy with my holga. =)

& the outing will not be perfect without "family" photos. =)

& then it was time for us to bid goodbye to our own private capsule. heh.

*part 3 coming up!

november 8th, 2009 (part one)

2009-11-14T00:18:00.009+08:00

i spent 8th november with the people i heart, besides my family of course.

mrt-ed to pasir ris, reaching at slightly before 11am & waited for fadzli to pick me up. & off we went to...

e-hub where we watched...

(pic credit: here.)
ASTROBOY!!!
ubber cuteness that boy-robot.
& i cried during the scene where astroboy was actually killed by the robot-villian. not exactly kiled by the robot-villian la but more of astroboy sacrificing himself. because in order to destroy the robot-villian, he will have to combine the red atom, which was in the robot-villian, with the blue atom, which was in astroboy. something like that la. there was no hope of reviving him initially because his blue core is unique & one of a kind. but ZOG, a hugeass robot he saved while he was on earth, actually came to the rescue. because when astroboy saved that robot, ZOG gave part of his blue atom to the robot, resulting in the robot being alive. so the robot gave back part of his blue atom to astroboy to revive him. but of course there were some scenes which made amirah laughed loudly. haha.

camwhoring session, toilet break & smoke break before we proceed for a long drive to kallang mcdees for our lunch before proceeding to the part two of this outing. =)

like going dating right both of them. haha.
ni part aku da sakit pinggang. tengah control sakit. haha.
so it was a long drive to kallang mcdees for lunch. in order to keep myself awake, i played around with the camera. =)
i have this bad habit of sleeping when fadzli drives. =P

haha. jari cacat. =P
60secs after taking this photo, amirah was off to lalaland. heh.
*part 2 coming up!

part 5.

2009-11-09T12:34:00.005+08:00

*scheduled post
tmr's the 10th of november.
*kening naiknaik*
my 22nd birthday.
on the eve of my birthday, we had an argument. which resullted in him driving all the way down to pasir ris to serangoon at 11-ish at night just to settle off the argument.
and we managed to spend the first few minutes of my birthday together.

my birthday's in november and it was the first time we will be celebrating my birthday.
and on the day itself, we went out on a date.

i had this impression that my birthday would consist of a romantic date/dinner/movie.
1st time celebrating my birthday with him what.
but guess what.

he brought me to suntec city on my birthday.
for some carshow. -_-

romance at its best.

i was not at all interested in these things so no, i didnt enjoy myself.
because he also didnt layan me as he was too busy snapping photos of the cars and the models.

romantic much?

he did though, after we spent 3hours or so in the carshow, asked me if i had enjoyed myself.
i think my face showed it all because he made it right back for me.

we spent the rest of the day just walking around suntec & marina, window shopping and such. and we caught a movie too, i think.

not really a typical birthday celebration i forsee. haha.
though he did make it right subsequently by spending the rest of my birthday proper. haha. =)

i think i should feel happy that we managed to celebrate 3 of my birthdays together on the day itself, ie. 2006, 2007 & 2008.
because this year, the organisation he's working for, the whole lot of them had their leaves freeze due to some major event that is happening. =(

tak tau malu.

2009-11-06T17:45:00.002+08:00

my 25th birthday is around the corner.
ouh god! a quarter of a century old. -_-"

so since my birthday is around the corner,
i have the excuse of not being tak tau malu. haha.
and put up a very last minute wishlist. =P

120 eyeshadow palette at sgd33. =)

10 creamy concealer palette at sgd21. =)

24 bobbi brown dupe brushes at sgd31. =)
though even if i get the 12 bobbi brown dupe brushes at sgd24, i wont mind. =)

picture credit: here.

3 main items i would want. especially the brushes because most of my brushes are screwed up already.
sad story much?

though i seriously doubt i will be getting any of them on my birthday. haha. prolly i'll just purchase them myself one of them days. haha.
but of course, money would do just fine too. ;)

& since we are on the topic of birthdays,
i would like to wish a
HAPPY 63RD BIRTHDAY TO MR. RAHWOM.
yeah. its my dad's birthday today. =)

journal.

2009-11-04T13:28:00.002+08:00

i remember when i was in primary school,
i used to have a diary with that lock at the side.
and in that diary, it will be full of my "deepest & darkest" secret.

i remember when i was in secondary school,
i used to have a diary which was actually just an a'zone notebook.
with the cover i decorated & my secrets were written through lyrics of songs or maybe poems.

i remember when i was in pre-u,
i used to have a diary which was actually a sketch book.
my secrets were told through phrases i thought of or just doodles/drawings to show my feelings.

i remember when i started working,
i used too have a diary which changes each year.
but this time the only secrets written in it were appointment dates & time for work purposes.

it was also when i started working, i got used to bottling up my feelings. because showing my feelings at that time was a sign of weakness. because the first full time job i had actually requires me to be in charge and "stable". even when stress built up, i was not able to "blow up" because i am in no position to do so. i need the volunteers to respect me as a staff of that organisation. even when i feel like crying, i just brush that feelings aside and continued on doing my work.

& because of that, i feel safer in this little bubble i've blew for myself to stay in. where my feelings are rarely made known.

many times fadzli's been telling me that i should not bottle up my feelings. its not healthy, he said. i guess maybe because he has seen the bottle my feelings been stored in burst due to holding on to more than what it could.

trust me, i've tried.
but everytime i try not to bottle up my feelings & express myself, i screw up.
and that feeling just suck. =(

of late, i've been doodling, again.
and it takes my mind off things for a little while.
maybe i should consider having a journal back in my life.
because like how it was during my schooling days, my journal would be the only place i trust enough for me to safekeep my feelings.

part 4.

2009-11-03T23:29:00.002+08:00

*scheduled post

but of course every rship has its ups and downs.

the first argument.
we are such lame asses, i tell you.
we had our first official argument on, out of all days, 18th october 2006.

yes, on the day we became official, we had our first argument.

he picked me up after work and we went to east coast park because i wanted to experience ordering macdees at the drive-thru.
yes, it was my first experience ordering via a drive-thru. haha.

we sat around enjoying our meal and our dessert of milkshake.
and in the midst of our talking, he asked me a VERY stupid question.

he asked me,
"are you my wife's spy?"

take note that during this time, though seperated and in the midst of a divorce proceeding,
he was still legally married.

i was like, "wtf?!"

& that was the cause of our very first argument.

but of course,
we settled it but i was still pissed then.
haha.

considering i had to work the day after, we ended our date quite early.
but it doesnt really matter because it was the time we spent together. <3

heart2heart.

2009-10-31T22:41:00.002+08:00

i've always loved impromptu dates with fadzli.
but never when the both of us are mad with each other.
and by 'mad', not madly in love but madly angry at each other.
like any other couples, we had our own ups and downs when we argue with each other like we've never loved each other before.

and yesterday was one such incident.
but lucky for me, i've a boyfriend who rarely lets his emotions take over. because in my case, my emotions will always take over in times like this. and seriously, i will say things that will really bruise the other party emotionally & mentally real bad.

so i was forced to meet him. i didnt want to meet him at first, even though god knows how much i missed him at this point of time, but my ego took over my mind insisting that i dont wanna meet. haha.
but ouh wells, my heart said otherwise. =P

so we did. we had a lunch+dinner at jalan kayu.
initially we wanted to go over to yishun dam. but changed our minds and decided to go somewhere else with shelter, just in case it rains. which was a better choice because it did rain. haha.
so we sat, overlooking the expressway. romantic much?
and thats when the conversation began.

a to z was discussed. tears were shed. screaming ensued.
the root of the argument. what led to the argument. what i think and felt. what he think and felt. facebook issues (i know!). some of those damn girls on his FB (yes, i do not like some of them. can i name names?). & of course, trust.

truth be told, my trust level for him has decreased the moment he joined this sport. and to make matter worst, he has built a name for himself. & to make matters lagi worst, girls leftrightupdownbackcenter has been adding him up on FB. & to make matters lagi worst than lagi worst, he accepted their friend request because . i checked up on this girls using his FB account and when you look at some of these girls' friends list, their 200/300/400/500+ 'friends', 80% consist of his friends or other guys posing with their ride. yes, i check his FB account because i've got the password.

& he assured that those girls are nobody to him, no matter how much they throw themselves to him. my bf is not good-looking. its the truth and i told him that too. but having these girls throwing themselves at him is downright disgusting. disgusting not because my bf's look is not to die for but because these girls throw themselves at him for one obvious reason.

some may say that if i really love him, i wont doubt him. because its not as if he has cheated on me before or even lied to me during this 3yrs.
true.
but i also believe there's a first time for everything.
trust is not something i can give anyone fully. like what fadzli told me, he too dont expect me to trust him 100% because there's always a grey area where first times could happen.

i love you, baby.
i've always.

part 3.

2009-10-26T13:01:00.010+08:00

*scheduled post

there's 2 parts in this entry.

the date.
i received a message about him wanting to meet the day after which was the 15th october 2006 right after i entered my room. to which i agreed to.
& that was our FIRST date.

we went by public & i did him a favor of picking him up at pasir ris mrt station. terbalik kan.
it was simply because, he is a noob. i think i said that in the previous part.
he rarely takes the public transport. kental kan.
i have a kental mat for a boyfriend. haha.

so i brought him to cityhall where we hang around at esplanade.
and we broke fast at makansutra.
haha. yes, i fasted on our first date.
tapi my buka was hainanese chicken rice from a chinese stall.
style or whattttt.

i already said i tak betol what.

after our buka, walked over to suntec where we sat at the macdees.
& played with my then laptop, which has since died 2 yrs ago.
and the rest of the date was spent there, with our respective drinks from maccafe & fries.
romantic kan? sungguh.

snapped a few pictures. & there was where we had our first few photos taken.

ended our date at about 10plus.
dropped him off at the mrt station while i continued my way home by bus.

the confession.
we didnt meet the 2days after our first date because he had to work but we made plans to meet on his first off day after my work.
so during those days, we kept in contact by smses and talking on the phone. constantly. it was one of the days when he asked me whether i have any feelings towards him. to which i replied, it was too early for me to have any confirmation of any feelings of love towards him. he was a dear friend and i love him as one. whether or not i love him more than a friend, that i dont dare to say because i am, myself, not sure of my feelings.
i had to be "politically correct" because he was afterall a legally married man then & i didnt want to lose his friendship.

when i asked him the same question, i think he was trying to be "politically correct" too but he did say he sayang me. haha.

spent the early part of our pre second date chatting with him on msn.
he told me to listen to "angel in the night" by lovehunters, which i didnt have the mp3 in my work desktop.
so he sent me the lyrics to the song instead.

what i am going to share here is something which was never shared before with anybody else this 3yrs of our rship.
the ones in bracket were my replies when he first sent me the lyrics & the ones in red were his replies to mine.

I wasn't dreaming (You aren’t dreaming) .. I know.
never felt like this before
you're my lover (I am not your lover, I am just a friend) …U sure??
wanna love you more (Of course you can) … thank u.
here I am baby
hoping you're by my side (I hope you’d want me to be by your side) .. of course I do.
you're my angel in the night

it's been so long
I've been trying to say (It took you just 3 days la) .. I know … but it feels so long.
and it seems you keep on walking away (I didn’t) .. well this is part of the song
oh girl cant u see u mean so much to me (No, I can’t. I just know you like me) .. yes u mean so much to me.
and I just cant hide this feeling anymore
this feeling anymore (You confessed already, right?) .. yes I did….

but can I tell you that I love you (You only told me you like me) .. dgr2 sayang tu maknanya bukan love ah …
can I tell you that I need you (You never told me this. And I don’t think you do) .. never did told u … but the feeling of needing u is arising.
for awhile you're here
and the moment you're gone (I never was gone) .. hopefully it stays dat way.
leaving just the teardrops in my eyes (I made you cry?) .. as I told u .. very the almost.
you're my angel in the night
angel

I need to hold you
never wanna let you go
cos if you love me baby pls don't go
here I am baby hoping you're by my side
here I am baby hoping you're by my side
you're my angel in the night

wahaha. we were officially so kental.

then we became official.
& that was on wednesday, 18th of october 2006 at approximately 5.17pm.

till next part. =)

xoxo.

ps.: i know this particular photo, his face like want to kena sepak like that, right?

what in the world.

2009-10-24T23:24:00.010+08:00

i read the new paper, apart from my daily dose of the straits times, berita harian, yahoo! news, google news and not forgetting tmz.com & e! online.

but what really got me pissed of late are news in singapore, about those poor children. about how these innocent children became the victims of the animals who stayed in the same house as them instead of an isolated cage in the zoo. these children who could have a whole life ahead of them which was cut short by these animals.

i was out with my love the yesterday & i was reading the new paper while waiting for our food at puncak. read about the story of poor nikie, how the animal of the father actually killed her, albeit claiming it was not done on purpose.
so what if you dont mean to do it on purpose. as a father, does it give you every damn right to actually hit a 23month old senseless that way over a few broken pieces of your damn cigarettes? she, a 23month old baby, knew nothing. you leave your cigarettes lying around & she thought it was something she could play with. she's still a child and they are curious beings. goodness! even my niece & nephews are still curious about my makeups and contact lenses. and everytime i take off my contact lenses, they will watch in awe. BECAUSE THEY ARE STILL KIDS! & you had the cheek to ask for a lighter sentence just because you had another 2 younger kids with promises of being a better father? so it took you the death of your own child in your hands to realise that you need to be a better father? why didn't you realise that both your wife and yourself needs to be better parents when you left your 3kids at home while you're out shopping? you went out shopping and left nikie, who was 23mths old to take care of her two younger siblings. where in the world did both of you put your brains? what does a 23month old kid knows what to do?

i seriously wanted to cry when i read the news in the new paper yesterday. tears of sadness for little nikie and tears of anger for both her parents. especially where it was described that she was beaten up to the extend of not being able to stand up & the stupid ass of the father actually punched her back. & what did the mother do? she did nothing. NOTHING! because she said that it was a norm & its ok for the father to beat nikie up to "discipline" her.

i was more emotionally inclined to this story because this was done by her own father. not stepfather, not the mom's bf. but her own flesh & blood. i could "understand" the other stories about those men who abused their stepchildren/gf's children till death though of course i am not saying it is acceptable. it is never acceptable to kill someone but these people have no "bond" so maybe they dont feel anything towards the kids. but in the case of nikie, it was her own father. nikie was the result of his sperm & his wife's egg. how could he do that? beating her the way he did is not a way of disciplining a 23mth old kid.

then when you realise the kid aint moving, you made her milk & tried to give her chocolate. you watched too much cartoons, you know those scenes where a character fainted & all they had to do was to put food in front of the person & the character will "wake up"?

wtf.

so Fadzli was saying about how this mindset of these people is different from us. but i dont think that by being a primary 5 dropout give you the sorry of an excuse to act like some animal. if you dont think you are mentally ready to be a father, then dont. if you still think enjoying your time alone with your spouse without caring about leaving your children alone at home, then dont be parents. fine, ok. sometimes you'd like to spend some time alone as a couple to relive those dating days. but dont leave them alone. get someone you trust to take care of the kids while you are gone. or at least drop them off at their grandparents'. dont leave a 23mth old kid to take care of her younger siblings. if you think your cigarettes are more important than the life of your children, then dont have any children. you spend $11.60 on a pack of cigarettes, which is the most expensive cigarettes (i think. in this case, i think prolly it should be some low grade cigarette). so $11.60 is more precious to you than the life of your own child?

how much is a pack of condom? wear it. if you dont think you can afford any other forms of contraception. prevent your little men from entering the cave. at least you are doing your part of not having children due to the result of your high sexdrive.
main je tau. anak tak tau jaga.

goodness!

like as if it is not enough, i read the paper today about how a father raped his 15yr old daughter with the excuse of wanting to "punish" her for things he said she did.
wtf.
crazy much?

on a different note,
Fadzli's somewhere in KL (i think) for his annual sepang trip.
& i miss him. =(

part 2.

2009-10-23T12:22:00.010+08:00

*scheduled post

i blogged about our pre first meetup between fadzli & myself.
& i ended somewhere about me not giving a very good first impression during our first meetup, right?
do take note too when we first got to know each other, i wasnt wearing the tudung. it was during halfway of our rship journey when i decided to start wearing it. so i'd appreciate it if you could just be open minded & keep that in mind when reading about what is going to be blogged about below.

so here's the continuation.

the first.
i didnt really call our meetup a date. it was just a plain old meetup between 2 friends.
the plan was to meet at 3.30pm. & i told him to wait for me in front of singapore post. you know the drop off point between the busstop and the traffic light?
yes, there.

so he reached there slightly before 3.30pm and msged me to inform me that he was already there.
but he had to wait for 45mins or so before my event finished. haha.
so can you imagine him blocking part of the first lane of the road with his car for 45mins. haha. bad impression number 1.

could see that he was properly dressed.
while i, on the other hand, was dressed simply in jeans, slippers and polo tshirt of the organisation which i was working for then. no make up either (except eyeliner) and my hair was just tied into a simple bun with my fringe clipped back.
nevermind the fact that it was a last minute thing agreeing to meet so mayb i wasnt really dressed proper but still, bad impression number 2.

and up till 2006, those who have known me long enough would know that i was a bit on the "tak betol" side.
and if you could remember, october 2006 was the fasting month.
it was either late sec 4 or early sec 5 when i "stopped" fasting. because i don't think it will make any difference to my already "colourful" life which was filled with alcohol, cigarettes, etc.
so when i met him, i brought along kuehs & stuff which was given out to the attendees of the seminar for the breaking of fast.
he was fasting but i on the other hand wasnt fasting. so while he was driving, i actually forced him to eat the kuehs which i brought along.
so i broke his fast. haha. ouh god.
bad impression number 3.

after sending the brownies to my ex, we went somewhere where we chatted and chilled.
so he asked me why i never bothered to ask what he was working as. i asked & he asked me to guess.
which i did. & i guessed that he was those guy who drives those big lorries for their company.
you know those lorry which they decorated like as if its their own. but obviously i guesses wrongly.
because he was working as something else which i dont think i need to blog about here. haha.
didnt believe it at first because seriously, he doesnt look like one.
it was when he showed me the proof that he is working as what he told he's working as, i believed him.
bad impression number 4.

and bad impression number 5, the last bad impression, i hope.
i was making fun of him for being a noob on certain things.
haha.

we ended our meet up at approximately 10pm or so.
he sent me home, & that was it.
no goodbye kiss, no see you next time.

told you it wasnt a date.

till the next part. =)
need to siap. my love picking me up at 1pm. =)

xoxo.

part 1.

2009-10-21T16:45:00.010+08:00

*scheduled post

so,
it was fadzli's and my 3rd anniversary.
36 months.

to some, maybe this is a short time.
but to those who knew the real story of our journey to get to this 3years would understand why we treasure this rship of ours so much.

& i am sharing our story. some may have known a bit of the story but never 100%. maybe about 10% to 15% of the story.
but today, to commemorate our 3rd anniversary (cheh... to commemorate ke perr..), i am sharing about 80% of the story. =)
but it will be divided into different parts. because it is too long. haha.

not exactly a romance novel material, i guess.

how we met...
we met in alamak chat, sometime in july 2006.
yes, out of all places.
that particular chatroom where many guys are preying for naive & stupid girls and some girls who readily give themselves to these guys.
and amongst these people, we found each other.

we continued chatting on msn.
talking crap, i think. & never did it crossed my mind to ask him of his status and job and whatever.
because at that point of time, i didnt think it was relevant at all for our friendship which was forged on the virtual world. something which we both guessed wont be ventured into the real world.
and even though from the virtual world, we took a step further in terms of friendship to being in contact on the phone, i still dont think those information about him was important for me to know.
he, on the other hand, had knew by now information about me; my status, my workplace, my designation, my home, etc & most importantly my full name.

that was until a few days into october.

i asked for his help to drive me to jalan besar stadium because i had to go there for work purpose. & i have no idea where in the sunny island of singapore was that place. but i had to at the last minute to back out from the favor i asked for because i went with my nephew and a volunteer of mine.

but on the 14th of october 2006, i asked for another favor from him.
to send me to toa payoh after my event at singapore post. to deliver brownies ordered by my ex for his gf's birthday. or something like that.
so basically, that was the first time we are going to meet. & still i dont think it'd be relevant to find out information about him.
because i assumed that the meeting we are going to have would be a one-off thing. and won't be repeated.

it was prior to the meeting, he sent me a message asking me to ask him about his status.
which i did.
and he told me his status.
he's seperated from his wife and in the midst of a divorce proceeding. & he has 2kids from his marriage.
and being an open-minded person i am, i was like, "ok. nothing wrong being friends with a divorcee what. friends je pe."
plus at that point of time, i needed a ride to toa payoh from paya lebar.
simply said, i asked to meet because i needed transport.

& so,
we met.

i didnt really gave a good impression during our first meeting. haha.
why?

in the next entry. =)

xoxo.

when 36 is also 3.

2009-10-19T20:29:00.010+08:00

sunday was spent with my love from 12.30pm onwards.
it was afterall our anniversary.
& i just got back home at approximately 4pm or so just now.

went for our short getaway where most of the time was spent eating, swimming and tanning.
& i think the sun hates me.
because no matter how much tanning oil i used & how long i stayed in the sun, i still didnt get any darker.
but instead, it gave me rashes.

ok, i am not really sure if the rashes were from the sun or the water but i reckon it was from the combination of both.
so now, my neck and face is itching like mad.

bummer.

i didnt get to do anything for him.
coz i lack the materials and time and mood albeit the idea that had been playing in my head.
maybe i will do it in the end but then it'll be a tad belated anniversary gift.

i rarely buy him gifts. i dont think i ever did.
& i prefer doing something. but i didnt this time.

sorry if you were expecting something from me. =(

i love that we spent together more than 24hours together.
and he actually sacrificed his sleep after his night shift just so he could spend the day with me. thank you!

i know i have not been the perfect girlfriend for you.
i know i have not been a considerate girlfriend sometimes.
i know that sometimes i do/say things that will purposely piss you off.
but this is the best i can be, for now.
i am, afterall, only human. so are you. =)

i may know nuts about your interests - bikes, bikes and more bikes.
& you may know nuts about my interests - bags, shoes & more bags & shoes.
we may be the total opposites of each other.
but like what you told me before, its the opposites that attracts.

i guess what really matters for now is we pull through the situation we are in now, together.
and if we could go through all that for 36 months, i am sure we can go through life as it is for another 36months, and another, and another,
till our time is through.

insya'allah.

our rship may not be all rainbows & butterflies.
we may argue alot amidst those happy times we had.
but trust me, irregardless of some things we may say in angst, i'd rather spent my lifetime arguing with you than be with someone else.
because i know, no matter how much we argue, no matter how much we say things on purpose in order to hurt each other,
we still love each other.
and even though some people may not understand it,
what matters is we do.

i love you.

36th.

2009-10-18T15:00:00.007+08:00

* please take note that this is scheduled post. so by the time post is published publicly, i will be on our anniversary getaway. =)

hah.
once you blog you cant stop.

ok.
truth be told, i've been blogging since i stopped blogging on highonlollies.
but, urmmm, it was blogged in such a way that i was anonymous.
and i totally love the feeling of knowing that i am anonymous to many out there.

i specifically chose this date to reopen a new blog because it is the 36th monthsary of fadzli & me!

36 months of laughter & tears.
36 months of happiness & sadness.
36 months of romance & fights.

& most importantly,
36 months of love.

i love you, baby.
i love you yesterday, today & tomorrow.

its us against the world, sugar.
us against the world.